|Reviews for splatter patterns|
| simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 3/5/2011
"fueled by the gun to your/head mentality"... the word the seemed really awkward to me. I can't explain why other than maybe it's hard to tell if you mean the "gun to your head mentality" or "the gun to your head mentality." I think maybe that or your if you meant the "gun to your head mentality" or just "gun to you head mentality" if you meant "the gun to your head mentality."
"those colours like the/way I mix these words"... I think you should either have "like I mix" or "the way I mix" you don't need both and it sounds kinda wordy.
"the contrast between the/orange and blue compliment"...I think you meant complement, but also it should be complements because the subject of the sentence (contrast) is singular.
"the contrast between the/orange and blue compliment/each other like how the"... That doesn't make sense to me. I feel like either the orange and blue are complementing each other or the contrast is complementing something else. I don't think the contrast between them can complement each other. I mean maybe it can, but it sounds wierd if you say it that way.
"page enrages this passion"... don't like the word this. Is it your passion? Her passion? Just passion in general?
"creating, destroying/after all you're the/creator and the only".. repetition of create didn't sound so good.
So I know this may seem silly 'cause of all the comments I made, but I think this is one of your best pieces that I have read. The way you compare the writing and the painting was really beautiful and seamless as was the way you described her painting. It's a beautifully written piece already. Incredibly well done. With a few tweaks I think it could be absolutely amazing.
| lymli chapter 1 . 3/4/2011
this makes me think, sometimes' there's need to destroy in order to build something new.
| classic violet chapter 1 . 3/3/2011
I really felt the deep intense passionate emotions in this, like having an outlet, and how passionate one is about expressing them self through it. The two fish coming out of a gun sounds really interesting and inspiring, wish I could see it.