|Reviews for Suspension|
| EmeraldReporter chapter 1 . 10/8/2011
I really liked this story.
Was the submissive a Fallen Angel? Or was "angel" a nickname?
Please add a part two!
| dx713 chapter 1 . 4/24/2011
I see you continue to like kinky characters. But here, it becomes much more creepy!
I felt the creepy, so as a horror story, you achieved your goal.
Your English is clean and your descriptions easy to read.
I'd make two criticism:
First, your characters lack some substance, some back-story or inner thoughts. I know it's difficult to do on a short piece, but here, I cannot see anything about them past their current actions. I feel more like a voyeur than a reader.
Second, (but this is more personal), I don't like your point of view choice. The 3rd person omniscient mode you use works for me only if it's distanced enough. Here, you get inside feelings. In that case, I'd rather you use limited 3rd person point of views,or even 1st person, and don't jump from one character to another so often.
| Natural and fake beauty chapter 1 . 3/19/2011
i liked this.