|Reviews for My World|
| simpleplan13 chapter 1 . 3/20/2011
"Where I could have my happily ever after."... you change tenses here with could. I didn't get that. I think can would fit better.
I liked the idea here. It was really cute and definitely something I think we all do at times. We all want to escape like that.
The actual writing was ok. Some of phrasing like "anything I want" and the word "world" just got a bit repetitive. I also thought maybe some more imagery or metaphors to describe the place as oppossed to what you can DO there.
PS Check out the Review Game and/or its Review Marathon (links in my profile)
| Allyson Parker chapter 1 . 3/16/2011
No matter what excuse you use ("I was zoned out so it's not my best") that was really good.