|Reviews for Amplify My High|
| Traquor chapter 3 . 8/2/2011
wow, you said my writing was good, but your writing is way better than mine! :) I think this story is awesome, the characters especially. No cookie-cutter personalities for Holland and Mackenzie (plus, Holland is just an awesome name)
This hasn't been updated for a while, but I hope you continue
| MyFadedDreams chapter 3 . 7/4/2011
So, this wasn't too bad but there are a few things I'd like to point out.
First of all, the cliche aspect hasn't really gone away. Some of the scenes feel like something out of a bad romantic comedy, like when he sees her in her underwear or they go to the porn store. It just feels like you're trying too hard to get some serious sexual tension going or something.
I'm not entirely sure why I should care about the characters. Towards the end of chapter three, you did a nice job with Makinzie's personality but most of the other characters still seem flat. The girls, especially, all seem to be cardboard cutouts of each other. There's a lot of drama that I'm not entirely convinced is necessary, but then again, I don't know where this is going so I guess that's more of a personal oppinion.
I still don't like the sticky note thing. Why on earth would you want to announce to the world exactly what you're doing behind closed doors with your personal life? It's just a little wierd how open they all are about everything. Everyone is an individual and I sincerely doubt that they ALL are ok with advertising their personal lives on a post it note.
I think thus has some good potential and your writing and grammar dedinitely shows promise. I hope these reviews were helpful and not too harsh or offensive. Best of luck to you in all your writing.
| MyFadedDreams chapter 1 . 7/4/2011
Not bad so far. The whole boarding school premise is very cliche, but all cliches can be turned into something original, which is what I hope to see here as the story progresses. I thought Hollands character came out through the narration very well.
The thing with the sticky notes is an interesting idea, but I'm not sure if I like it or not. It seems a little contrived. I also wasn't a big fan of the scene where they go back to Makinzie's appappartment, and then she just sends him home. That scene seemed totally pointless to me and I think you would have been better off without it since it does nothing to advance the story.
I'm not quite sure how to feel about Makinzie at this point. At first it seemed like she was going to be different (which is also a bit cliche), but later in the chapter she's just like everyone else (which is kind of an original twist but maybe not in a good way). Do you want that kind of confusion or do you want us to like her?
Some of the dialogue felt a little forced, not as natural or realistic as I would have liked. For the most part it was ok, but some of it was just a bit awkward or made me wonder why thwy're talking about that.
The grammar was refreshingly clean and I think your writing has a lot of potential. I'll get around to reading the rest if this hopefully soon.
| kaymonkeygirl chapter 3 . 6/30/2011
Please update soon! Love this!
| amblynh chapter 3 . 5/28/2011
"...because- holy crap- girls owned a lot of clothes." Made me lol.
Anyways, good chapter. (:
I'll be on the lookout for the next one.
| Its.Not.Me.Its.You chapter 2 . 4/11/2011
Laughed so hard at the ending.
| fromtheheart14 chapter 2 . 4/11/2011
hey my computer was being stupid and wouldnt let me log on...but u know who i am hahahha
And yeah fp has been doing that to me too, its very annoying...it does the same thing whne i try to edit my profile...
Good chapter by the way! Im interested to see where this story is going :)
| Poe in a Bottle chapter 1 . 4/6/2011
Hey! I really liked this first chapter! From the get go I loved how we immediately get a sense of who Holland is. Its good for putting us in his mindset and relating to him. I'm also in love with his personality. I love how insecure he is and how he always second guesses himself without complaining (complaining can be super detrimental when reading a story). I like your descriptions of things, but I would like to learn more about the school setting wise, seeing as how this is where the story will be taking place.
I love the sticky note thing, too. Here we use a series of knocks to indicate what we're doing and if it's okay to come in.
I'm eager to read about Holland (who has an awesome name btw) and Mackenzie's relationship and how he will change in the long run. Updates would be appreciated. :)
| amblynh chapter 1 . 4/4/2011
I like this. Hope to see it updated soon. Just a note, if the twins are boy/girl then they have to be fraternal, no matter if they look alike or not.
| Fromzeheart14 chapter 1 . 4/4/2011
wow, i actually like this. Its an interesting idea.
I mean its sorta confusing in the middle there, but i havent decided if thats good or bad.
But im def. Interested. Honestly i was afraid of reading this because sometimes ppl ask me to review stories and theyre just so bad and i end up feeling bad for tearing their stories to shred with constructive critisizm. But yay for you, because youre pretty good!
| firestar267 chapter 1 . 4/3/2011
This looks really interesting, it was well written and I can't wait for more!
| Its.Not.Me.Its.You chapter 1 . 4/2/2011
It sounds interesting.
Can't wait for more.
I really wanna know about the post it thing.
| andi chapter 1 . 4/2/2011
oh my. Very good first chapter! I love your characters and how believable they are! I'm looking forward to reading more!