Reviews for Swimming
skersey chapter 1 . 5/18/2011
I like the mental pictures you use throughout the poem, like "combing through a creamy kaleidoscope" and "Silvery notes stealing towards the sky." Stuff like this really give an accurate explanation of those natural parts of life...such as swimming. Nice job :)

My only suggestion to you would be to have a premace to it, keeping the imagery. Like, are you (or the person) swimming away from something, or just enjoying the moment? I feel like this poem is a little disjointed, and would serve as giving your poem an extra layer.