This story was in my opinion, beautiful. I loved the way your style of writing and even added some new words into my vocabulary! I'm glad I just so happened to come across this story via my favourite authors favourite stories! Well done and good job!

I discovered this story randomly. I simply wanted to read a story that was well written, had a good plot and interesting characters. I thought I would maybe read a chapter or two and then get bored. Usually these kind of stories, especially on this site, are awful in both plot and grammar. Don't get me wrong, I can handle some mistakes here and there, but when it is the entire story that is riddled with easily corrected mistakes, I tend to run away as fast as I can.

That is why I am happy to say that this story is one of the very best that I have read on this site (and I have read a LOT). Ran is a character that is near and dear to my heart. I too have faced bullying in the past and this story really hit close to home, even though I live in America and not Japan.

Thank you for sharing this wonderful story with us. If this was published as a book I can honestly say I would probably be one of the first in line to buy it. You have a real talent for words and I truly believe that you could be a famous writer one day if you put your mind to it. Good luck with the future. I am going to go look for more of your stories. They really are very wonderful!

Sincerely,
Kai

This has got to be one of the original fan fics i've ever read. Three hours later and i've finally managed to read this monstrous magnificent masterpiece in one sitting.

I love everything about this fic: the plot, the character development, the build-up, the attention to detail, the angst, the friendship, the romance; everything that i could think of, i love it. You are a wonderful writer, and you have such an incredible gift for making the readers empathise with your characters so much that the readers cry in the middle of the night because they feel so sorry for your characters.

I love ran for her never-say-die philosophy in life and for being so endlessly loving and caring and understanding for anyone and everyong around her. She's my role model now, you know ~_

Shiori - i admire her for overcoming her prejudice and seeing ran for who and not what she is. I ike her because she slowly and steadliy became strong for herself and for her love and be whoever she wanted to be.

Himeko - i love her unflinching acceptance of ran and then later on her sister's relationship even though her mother was the biggest hypocrite of all time. I love that she punched through ran's walls and embraced her from the inside without question or demand on who she ought to be.

Chikane - i love how she took on the 'older sister' role for ran right from the start, taking her in under her wing and providing her protection whenever she can. Her flirtatious nature didn't hurt either.

Hideo - the first person to take notice of ran's ability and changed everything for her. For that alone i can only love the man so much.

Eriko - this butch manager has atood up for ran ever since the beginning and necer faltered her in hiidance of the young girl; she has my eternal praise for that.

Megumi - i thought she's an aunt, but anyway, cousin is close enough i guess. She really couldn't hide her bias with ran anymore than she can hide her relationship with eriko, can she? *grins*

And then kenji and his mother, tanaka, sasaki, her landlord, jiro and yumi...they are all fantastic characters. Each and everyone of them.

Oh well, i'm off to take a rest; i'll be sure to read up on your other fics as soon as i can.

One last thing; might i entice you for a brief epilogue? Say, maybe when they are already on their third year, and chikane and kana visits them for the break; kinda like a life after the trials and tribulations with a much less burdened and a happier ran with her ever loving girlfriend shiori and bff himeko and supportive megumi and eriko? _

I have to say that it's refreshing to see a writer on FictionPress who bothers to set up a premise, characters, and backstory before diving into conversations. So often than not, writers on here love to just jump head first into a story before the reader has a chance to get to know anyone, thus making it impossible to care about the characters. So I was very happy that you cared enough to set up the "world" before getting into the story.

As for the story itself, I enjoyed it. Since I also write school dramas, I was a fan of that. You also have a knack for writing characters, which people under estimate I feel. So often authors either writer characters as one-note, or else they all act the same exact way. So it's nice to read a story where everyone feels alive and their own person.

As for critiquing (since you brought it up at the end of most chapters), I'm not sure if I should. Since this is your first posted work, and I'm commented to this 4 years after the fact, some of the things I noticed probably have been ironed out by now. I'm not sure it's my place to say, given I love that there is an author like you on here and I feel there needs to be more like you on this site. But just for the sake of things I mention two things. Earlier in the story, there tended to be a lot of info-dump, only to be repeated by characters later. Also, sometimes the info-dump would show your hand on set ups, kinda taking the wind out of a dramatic moment. The other thing was Ran came off as a Mary-Sue a number of the times. She's painted as a bullied tortured girl, but nothing effects her and generally she's prepared for everything and stuff just works out for her. I do feel that towards the end this wasn't the case at all, but it took around 20 chapters to get there.

Once again, I'm so hesitant to say these things because of the given reasons above. I can tell that you grew during the course of this story, and those things I noticed started to pop up less and less. Overall I loved the story, and because of it I'm going to start another story of yours soon.

So anyone else reading this, don't let the negative things I said above stop you from looking into this story. CX is one of the better author I have encountered on FictionPress and the story is good enough to be published with some tweaks. Definitely a good read for some vanilla yuri and overall good high school drama.

I'd love to read an epilogue chapter. Maybe meet the parents kind of thing during Xmas? Then again, it could also be a sequel of how Ran meet her real 'family' and learn to love and be loved in return.

Amazing story with wonderful characters. I love the way you wrote the facts about bullying and discrimination. There's so much work you put into details. I can see you're a dedicated writer. I hope to read more of your stories especially continuing the adventure of Ran-chan.

Nice story...i really loved it.
grear job

I really hope that Ran and shiori get along in the future,
and for chikane and himeko as well,
and people start to be alittle better and nice.
nice story...till this chapter I liked it.
Im forwarded to read to the end :)

I know it's been a few years since you finished this story but your wording for giving the characters "a break for a little while" made me wonder, are you thinking of writing a sequel for this story? You've created some wonderful characters, and I'm sure I wouldn't be the only one interested in checking in on them and see how they're doing in the future! Really enjoyed it, thank you for sharing your story with us.

I love your story, another awesome chapter ! Thx for posting this and please keep writing !

Have i told you that your story is awesome ? Ok it is awesome, and you are an awesome writer ! Thx for posting this and please keep writing !

oh thats evil, a jealous shiori !? Awesome story ! Thx for posting this and please keep writing !

This story is simply awesome ! Thx for posting this and please keep writing !

finally something sweet happens for Ran. great chapter. Thx for posting this and please keep writing !

Great chapter, awesome story, awesome writer ! Thx for posting this and please keep writing !