Reviews for Break
skersey chapter 1 . 8/19/2011
I love your images. Like when you talk about where your pieces can go: the palm of your hand, the bottom of your purse, the whites of your eyes (my personal favorite, it's almost as if the pieces become part of the speaker and he's taken ownership of it like a trophy or something) They really convey to the reader how small these pieces are, as well as how hard this person broke the speaker (or you, I don't know if you yourself are the speaker)

"bury me at the food of/someone else's bed" was another one I really liked. It's almost worse than a grave, because it implies that the person has moved on and has someone else to be with (in my mind anyway, I could be wrong)

the last two lines were interesting because of the abruptness, it makes a weird rhythm, but a good kind of weird.

Really nice piece! Keep writing :)