This story is just amazing. The title just drew me in and then the beginning was spectacular. I'm glad that you got straight to the point without taking forever. Robert is so messed up. But I have to say I like him. Great job with the story, it's written beautifully and it seems that there are no mistakes. Bravo!

-PurpleEmoChick

I'm glad sophie Is more proffesional now.

Thanks for updating so soon :)

ahahaha my point exactly XD niice.

This story is brilliant! but for some reason you only have 6 reviews. I hope you have the plotline planned out because it would suck if you didn't know where this story is going, considering that would make two of us. I love this story. I love reading about Luke and Rob and Sophie. The characters all seem to have depth. It's very nice.

-Tra-vation/Anon

Oh my god robert and sophie are so CUTE.

Love this story! Absolutely enthralling. I loved the little sideplot with Gwyn and Rylan and the mystery just keeps building up. But now i'm confused as to who's the "he" mentioned in the summary, Luke or Robert. They both sound pretty hot :D Update soon pleasepleaseplease (:

This is such a cute idea! Keep up the good work. :)

So far I think what you've written is great. I hope that last review didn't discourage you. It's important that you are detailed in your writing so that the reader can picture it in their head. I did not think that you being detailed was at all boring.

There weren't any grammatical errors that stood out to me, so keep up the good work with that and keep writing the story the way you want to write it, after all you are the author. I'll definitely read everything else you have posted when I find the time.

Keep up the good work!

~World of Ink~

Wow, this is great, update soon!

Mistakes

Unlike the rest of her peers, Sophie had a plan. In fact, her entire life revolved around it.

- I think you should have joined this two sentences with a '-' instead of a fullstop. They both share the sane line of thought after all.

As she walked through the campus, she tried to ignore the other students who were spending their time relaxing, or playing with friends.

- do college students play with each other- minus the sexual innuendo. Replace the 'playing' with 'hanging out'.

"Studying? On a day like today I thought you would've been painting."

- I think you should put a comma within the second sentence... When writing lines for a character, say it aloud and if it doesn't sound right or if it needs something within it, it'll be easy to spot.

Before her grandmother had passed away she'd asked him to look after Sophie,

- by saying 'she'd' It makes you sound as if the character was planning on doing that action... Like a step or something. Maybe break the two words into 'she had'?

You ramble on about designs and your characters surrounding, which I highly doubt are interesting and useful to the audience/readers.

Try not to repeat yourself, it felt like you were doing that the entire story. Make new nicknames for your characters 'red headed girl' or 'quiet and shy girl'. 'the thief' should be used in your next chapter or something.

It sounds like an interesting story and the summary was great, but try not to bore us with details and stuff.

Your characters aren't perfect at speaking so make sure you 'umms' and 'errrs' to their lines.

~ .

Don't contact me to complain about my review.