|Reviews for Water Comes to Life|
| Punslinger chapter 9 . 6/1/2014
This is a very good re-working of the story. Sharp tight writing to make readers feel the tension and flow along with the characters. Regrettably, I don't have time to go back and read the whole thing over, but I think I remember the details pretty well. Are you going to continue developing it with future chapters?
| Punslinger chapter 8 . 8/1/2012
I had to prod my memory to get back into the story
line-the price you have to pay for letting so much time
elapse between updates. But your unique moodiness
continues to cast its spell."-that cloud looks like a scream." Right on. Sometimes the senses become so
confused that it's hard to tell the difference between
what we see and hear, not to mention feeling.
| Punslinger chapter 7 . 2/11/2012
Very good for a chapter that's long on dialogue and short on action. The conversation flows nicely.
| Punslinger chapter 6 . 1/8/2012
Good job of taking us into the mind of a psycho killer. Very creepy-moreso when we realize that, under other circumstances, we could be as loony as Matt.
| Punslinger chapter 5 . 12/23/2011
You did a good job of making me feel the panic and dread of awakening from a nightmare. It's always more terrifying when
one can't recall specific details but knows that something horrible lurks deep in the subconscious, "like being trapped beneath the ice," as you put it so well.
| AyakaxMelon chapter 1 . 12/23/2011
OH wow! that's fascinating! i love your intro! and i love all these people's stories. you certainly did a good job there.
definitely adding this.
| Punslinger chapter 4 . 11/12/2011
Very good for such a short chapter. You manages to express the mixed emotional state of a young man in love with much feeling.
| Punslinger chapter 3 . 11/6/2011
Very good. I've been waiting impatiently for you to get to the romance.
I think "missaled" is misspelled. And: "She sunk down next to me." Should that be "sank?"
| Punslinger chapter 2 . 10/21/2011
It has been so long since I read the first draft that it's hard to recall it in detail. But this seems to be a vast improvement. The writing is extremely well done, with gripping character and plot development. Matt doesn't seem as well fleshed-out as Jean and Paul, maybe just because you haven't yet spent as much time on him. Ray is a good supporting player.
I usually don't like so much introspection by characters, but it fits in well here and doesn't hamper the story's flow.
Btw, this review covers Chapters 1 and 2, in case you wondered if I had read both of them.