|Reviews for Just desserts|
| OrigamiPaperAngel chapter 1 . 11/6/2011
Oh, I really liked this story! Very clever ending, along with a nice lesson. I enjoyed this :)
... Aaaand you know what else I enjoy? Constructive criticism time! :D~
Okay, so, the story you tell is great, but the ending was a little confusing. At the "so what do you think, kiddies?" I got confused and I thought that was the author asking for reviews... then I re-read it two more times and THEN got it XD I think the story would be better if there was something there, like quotation marks, or whatever, to make that part a little clearer and to avoid confusion. Also at the beginning I thought it was a poem at first because everything was on different lines, so I'd have preferred it if the beginning would merge together in seperate paragraphs rather than seperate lines.
Other than that, I really love this! 'Twas quite a clever and entertaining read, perfect for Halloween! D