Reviews for Connection
Rynn j chapter 7 . 12/4/2011
Wow! I really liked the begining of the this story. Its amazing. These girls seem so real. It feels like I actually know them. Please write more. I want to know what happens. (Ruby is my favorite)
drown in my desire chapter 7 . 11/25/2011
The only thing I can say about this story is perfect.
veda-p chapter 7 . 11/23/2011
This is wonderful! The only thing I don't really get is that Amelia has some sort of internal conflict. She wants Ruby to be a clone of herself, but she also wants Ruby to BE herself. I think this might lead to some confusion later on, but very well done. :-)
veda-p chapter 6 . 11/23/2011
I really like this one. You give great insight to Nicole's life and feelings, which is what we need to sympathise with her. Great job!
Vaxil T. Rookshire chapter 2 . 11/23/2011
Make your chapters longer. Other than that, damn good story. Must be published!
TheHopelessPen07 chapter 7 . 11/23/2011
no joke, sometimes my mom does the same thing-forcing me to mingle with other ppl. Except, when I don't, she just scolds me in Spanish. luv the chapter! just outta curiousity, will there be chapters seeing into the lives of the other girls?
TheHopelessPen07 chapter 6 . 11/23/2011
oh my stars and Moses...this...is...amazing! Each girl is unique, with her own problem that kept me reading, wanting more. btw, you're a VERY good writer! you go very deep into the characters, which is what I like. keep it up ;)
cerebral1 chapter 5 . 11/23/2011
Doesn't everyone know a Carla from their past? You did an excellent job of describing Carla's personality; the popularity game, the bragging, the loneliness deep down inside. You get into your character's head very well; probably the best of all, so far.

Your sentence structure and variety are improving as well. It was a smoother read, and that's probably why the character came to life better, as well. Great improvement!

I liked the line "I didn't appreciate being treated like a little girl {;} I was eleven back then, not bloody five!" Ha! Like that was so much more grown up!

Nit-pick: "who's" should be "whose", "It never done the Queen any harm" should be "...did the Queen any harm..."

I look forward to seeing how these characters come together. Great job. (And the rating is better, too, now. :D )
annabella7 chapter 1 . 11/21/2011
Definately continue! I'd love to see where your going to go with this story. :)
veda-p chapter 4 . 11/21/2011
Wow. So dark, but so realistic. You really make Rachael come to life. In a way, anybody can relate with her, but her situation isn't something a lot of us are used to.

This is really amazing!
cerebral1 chapter 4 . 11/20/2011
These are really heavy subjects you're tackling! I do find it interesting to see why people resort to these sorts of behaviors, however, esp. at such young ages,so kudos for you to be attempting a story with this subject matter.

I'm curious about all the girls' lack of memory before a certain age; could this be one person with multiple personalities that just started to materialize? Kinda eerie...

I also would suggest changing the rating to Teen, simply because of the use of the F-bomb. Always better to play it safe.

Lastly, I hope you also continue with The Mirror; I'd really like to see both these stories continue! Great effort!
veda-p chapter 3 . 11/20/2011
I love this chapter as well! Part of me wants to shake Jenni to wake up and actually look at herself in the mirror, and part of me feels sorry for her. Very good job!

And thank you for featuring me in this chapter! I really appreciate it as well. :-)
veda-p chapter 2 . 11/20/2011
Wow, I really love it so far! Please keep posting!
veda-p chapter 1 . 11/20/2011
Ooh, I really would love to see more of this!