|Reviews for Forbidden|
| SuperAppleSauce521 chapter 3 . 1/20/2012
This is a good story, I like it.3
| BandGeek333 chapter 2 . 12/23/2011
This is really good. I hope you continue to write this.
| Wendy Thompson135th chapter 1 . 12/7/2011
"Got ya." His voice rang.
"Shut up Jevan." I said.
"Not my fault you got caught, Elysia." Jevan said. ~~ More correctly punctuated/capitalized: "Got ya," his voice rang. "Shut up Jevan," I said. "Not my fault you got caught, Elysia," Jevan said. The standard form when who says it follows the dialogue is: "Look at Spot," said Jane or "I see spot," Dick said. ~~what's said and who says it make ONE sentence, and the period goes after the who said it.
I don't know how much fiction you've read, but the next time you open a novel or short story, observe the dialogue tag punctuation/capitalization.
| NorCalStar37 chapter 1 . 11/30/2011
Loved your story. i love forbidden love :). can you review my story. Forms of Magic, Book One River Rock
| NadiaMiki chapter 1 . 11/30/2011
It's quite interesting after I read through it :)
So this Cedric has a crush on Elysia's sister but why did he kiss her? Doesn't that mean he is lying?
Oh poor Jevan ! I want to help him regain Elysia XD Nah! Just kidding! Anyway, nice story and definitely my favorite! Can't wait to read the next one!