Reviews for Love like Winter
Zane Donovan chapter 1 . 9/11/2012
a brilliant work that I can only hope to ever come close to. Your imagery is both brilliant and inspiring. Please continue the good work.
J.M. Black chapter 1 . 12/13/2011
Such an interesting take on the subconscience. I can't wait to see how the dreams will parallel with reality. The point of view it is written from is very creative as well.

There are a few spelling and grammatical errors, but with a quick fix the beginning of this story will be perfection!

Keep writing!
Nia Moone chapter 1 . 12/12/2011
"Good or bad, it doesn't matter, just to be something" I wsould suggest italics on the word "something"

"I guess little do they know that ultimately because they have forever struggled to find an answer that was in their laps to begin with, being either good or bad was of no concern any longer." It may be just me, but this whole sentence makes no sense to me... Perhaps remove the word "ultimately" and insert a semi colon after the first "that"

"ones that deserve it not" remove the word "not"

"humans from will come and we wil" insert a comma between "come" and "and"

"in between" inbetween is one word

"But if you could see them too, well… let's just assume that it's going to be quite a surprise" change "if" to "when" and "could" to "can". The tense needs to be changed because humans will be seeing them when "the stitches come undone"

"All that is real now for humanity will survive when the world fails them" this section of sentence doesn't make sense.

"I triggered" insert "was" between "I" and "triggered"

"sisters as well for we were" insert a comma between "sisters" and "as"

"Upon triggering" insert "being" between "Upon" and "triggering" and alter "triggering" to "triggered"

"who triggered" insert "were" between "Who" and "triggered"

"until needed when the world" insert a comma between "needed"

and "when"

"the in between and he would rise" replace "and" with a comma

"Icy May, as his human self-deemed him was our creator" this sentence makes no sense and I can't understand what you want it to mean, so I have no corrections to offer.

"we call him May and he is our" insert a comma between "May" and "and"

"revelation that this all around him" replace "this" with "the world"

"In this dream was where I" Remove "In"

"I say as I walked from" incorrect tense, alter to "said" insert the word "out" between "walked" and "from"

"Next lovely creature waiting" begin the sentence with the word "The"

"and do naive" change "do" to "so"

"They spend their day" incorrect tense, change to "spent"

"told him parents" change "him" to "his"

"dark til sleep" insert an apostrophe at the beginning of "til".

"you trigger" insert "are" between "you" and "trigger" Change "trigger" to "triggered"

"once you have triggered" insert the word "been" between "have" and "triggered"

"with appreciate" change "appreciate" to "appreciation"

"yet it wasn't but I could" insert a comma between "wasn't" and "but"

"easily without diminishing any" insert a comma between "easily" and "without"

"ventured us a" insert "to pay" between "us" and "a"

"doading" incorrect spelling, change to "doating"

"Lana said a small" insert a comma between "said" and "a"

"His human trigger journeys" remove the word "trigger"

"I was you" chnage "was" to "want"

I am slighlty intrigued into hearing the rest of the story, it sounds quite interesting, good work!