Wow, really amazing story. I love it. I just read all 37 chapters in one go! Hope to read more soon :)

I am really liking your story, and I'm so glad it's not a real book so I don't have to go buy it and read it. Not that I wouldn't, though: you could make a lot of money turning this into a series! It's really good.

BTW, you should watch Merlin from BBC. It's about how Merlin and King Arthur became friends and stuff, and it's interesting because magic is oultawed in Camelot too, so Merlin has to run around keeping it a secret like Ardis. I think you would like it!

wasn't how i expected

keep writeing it is really good

The chapter was really nice and the story is going perfectly smooth so far except a few snags here and there.

You mentioned that Ardis can't read yet she is able to read the note given to her by Croth in the earlier chapters. I forgot to mention this point in my PM.

But anyway you are doing really well and I have followed your blog a few times.

Good luck and enjot life! :)

update soon...! :) :D

Who is Alynn? I forget... Was she another white magician?

It is your fault and I say that you should reconcile eith making longer "talks" between the main characters. :) just a thought. I loooove this story!

Aww short chapter. But better short chapter than none at all. I knew Ardis's father wouldn't be alive. There was no way. Sighhh...I just hope Capron can get over his hatred of magicians and go back to the way things were before with Ardis.

Yes, you're right, it *is* your fault.

:)

At any rate,I don't think you need to *hope* about us liking your chapters: it's pretty much a given that we will.

Like I've said more than once before: please work on publishing this jewel. I will be one of the first buyers when it is published, even though I would've already read the book. :)

really enjoyed it please write more

A BIT? Come on girl! You've gotta give me more than that! I think her reaction was reasonable because she was afraid that he was going to die at first, but then she became angry at his assumptions. His character I actually believed would get a lot more angry, but if you and in the cons such as hunger, dehydration, sun burns, cuts, blood, barely escaping with their lives- everything adds up. It takes energy to be angry, much less furious. So, if I was in his boots, I would have reacted about the same way he did. He could have said a LOT more hurtful things, but when there comes a point in life like this, you can't express so much emotion just because it's not worth it. He can get all in her face once this is all over. Right now, they just need to stay alive! Live! Survive!

Hahaha... I'm excitd by what would happen on chap. 38. The 2 of them seems like having a lovers quarrel.

Th0ugh in the prev. Chapters i was quite shocked to know that Torin's already healed. So i'm confused about how the plot really goes...

The story now focuses by what really Torin wants... And its like, world domination, isnt it?

Extraordinarily realistic reaction! Capron, at first, reacts out of sheer instinctive terror of magic, then later on reason comes to him and he realizes that she's on his side...

*thumbs up*

I don't have much to say. But yes, it's a bit short. Maybe you can describe how they act (hands waving in the air, shouts echoing across the desert, etc.)

"I'll let you answer that question yourself." - It took me a while to get it, but now I think it's the best line in this chapter.

Keep going!

-MathNerd3141

P.S. I've been trying and failing to draw that title page idea I gave you a while ago. I can't draw faces, for some reason :D

I think his reaction was really believable-wish the chapter was longer but apart from that I really enjoyed it :) xx

I think this chapter was very good, short but good. keep it coming I can't wait for the next chapter.

I like her new attitude (: