|Reviews for White Magic|
| SaphireBlaze chapter 70 . 12/30/2012
I spent the past two days reading this amazing story of yours and can I just tell you how incredible it is?! I just loved it so much and was basically reading it when I wasn't busy. :)
There are a few things that bothered me, though. Such as how detached Ardis' mother's death felt, and why her body was borderline ignored when in my imagination, Ardis should have been at her side instead of going back inside of the inn. Everything about Callana seemed so random to me to the point where I can't even understand her significance. The times they returned to that camp in the forest was a lot, too much in my opinion.
I'm also wondering why they tortured Capron and Ardis and left them to the wolves (along with HOW they were tortured, I'm interested in that little detail)? Because they were "neutral"? Or because they were against them all along? IF that's so, why did they allow Imara and Felix through without question or torment such as what they did to Ardis and Capron and that other guy that I never cared much about? Because Callana said so? But Callana was barely trusted, and (i'm sorry, I forget their name) they were against them all along and turned out to be the ones that they should be focusing their attention on, soooo whyyyy? What was the point of all of that if their "fate" ended up being useless in the end due to Imara's death? It seems to me like all of that was a bit unnecessary and just plain random and jumbled up. I feel like you can do a MUCH better job at fleshing out the details. In some instances I feel as if you are far better off some with and some without these things I have pointed out. They just leave plot holes in this incredible story.
I would also like to point out that FAKE Torin's death was like... what? I have no idea how that happened and who did it. It's like a blur. I also think that your story would have more of an impact if we see a clearer picture of what was going through Ardis' head when she sacrifices herself for Capron and that Ancient takes over her body. That part seemed so rushed that I was just... What...? I don't even KNOW. It was just confusing.
Also, where's the flower? D:
Maybe you can give us a Nadia's point of view of where she went? That would be REALLY interesting. And i'm genuinely curious as to what she's up to now, considering she isn't dead. SHe isn't dead, right?
You know what else would be cool? A LITTLE BIT OF FELIX? His point of view on Imara and everything? Please? Pretty please? That would be SO AWESOME THE POOR GUY DESERVES SOME ATTENTION OMG. T_T
I would also like to know what's going on through Torin's head. I feel like his thoughts and opinions would be very helpful knowledge throughout all of this. Because as of right now, he is just infuriating me!
I love Ardis and Capron so much... Their relationship is strained and awkward but I enjoy that. It's not your regular sappy romance. It is something really unique! Or maybe I just enjoy feeling tormented and wanting them to just kiss already... haha. But I'm guessing that you are saving that for one very special moment. I hope so. :)
You could have three new chapters with Torin, Felix, and Nadia's point of view. And they would be really interesting. Because I bet it's not just me who's dying to find out what's going on in these guy's head. I REALLY AM JUST DYING TO KNOW!
I love this story please keep up the good work and can I just say that this is book worthy? Yes, publish worthy, if you flesh out a lot of details and fix a few spelling and grammar issues. I saw some mistakes here and there as I read the 69 chapters, but they didn't happen all that often. I should have made a list, I'm sure that would have been extremely helpful for you! I didn't even think about it until now, though. So sorry! D:
| 1supergirl4 chapter 70 . 12/28/2012
I enjoyed this chapter and hope for another update soon! :)
| Sui Lestrange chapter 69 . 12/28/2012
so I've read this story in a few days time (xwork and all) and I'm absolutely in love with it! :D keep up with this! :D
| Ms.Julia chapter 69 . 12/28/2012
Sorry about the delay in reading/reviewing! I'm in Antigua lol but I loved the update, plz update again soon
| B chapter 69 . 12/25/2012
LOVED THIS CHAP!
| 1supergirl4 chapter 69 . 12/24/2012
I'm glad you updated again! Great job on the chapter and Merry Christmas! :)
| Carmel March chapter 68 . 12/17/2012
Wonderful chapter, great job on this! I'm sorry to hear about the writer's block...there's nothing worse. Hope you update soon :)
| Ms.Julia chapter 68 . 12/17/2012
Please update again soon :)
| 1supergirl4 chapter 68 . 12/14/2012
Another great chapter! I'm glad you updated again and I can't wait for more! :)
| B chapter 68 . 12/14/2012
Ardis! Ardis! Ardis!
Tough luck on your NaNo story:( Sometimes it's hard to get the words to flow. But I have faith in you!
| Hayley Jade Alisdair chapter 68 . 12/14/2012
Yay! An update! Very happy to see this chapter! I hope you write more soon :D
| theDollophead chapter 67 . 12/3/2012
It's nice to see Capron finally falling in love with Ardis :)
It's December now...update?
| Hayley Jade Alisdair chapter 67 . 11/22/2012
Can totally sympathize about NaNoWriMo... So much typing! I love this story though, it is brilliant, so many twists! Sorry if anything is misspelled, iPhone autocorrect is screwy
| Catrissa chapter 67 . 11/21/2012
Um, um... How are you going to break the curse on Capron? I want them to get married, have a couple of babies, and live happily ever afterrr!
| B chapter 67 . 11/21/2012
FINAL CHAPTERS? What? But this story is so short! Wait... no, it is like 66 chapters... Well, it felt short! Hahaha, I like where things are going:) The climax seemed perfect for me, but that is just me! I was so caught up in the moment, it worked. Yay! I am not the only one doing NaNoWriMo! Goodluck, girlfriend! Can't wait till December!