Reviews for The Baby Necromancer
Tharis chapter 21 . 10/11/2016
Should have had Vincent bargaining with the Fool more about what parts would get snipped.
Dwynwen chapter 38 . 6/14/2013
"Maybe you could have guided me to make better decisions, or helped me to make a better life of myself. Maybe you had another plan for your son; we could have worked towards it together. Perhaps you would have been a terrible father. Perhaps you would have led me into a deeper darkness than that which I am already in." - Yes, that could have happened. But did Vincent ever truly have to follow his father in the first place? Was it destiny or his own choices?
Dwynwen chapter 37 . 6/14/2013
The cloak of Sasha drew tight around Vincent like a hangman's noose, causing the necromancer to gasp involuntarily. - I can't help but think she's his last real link to humanity.

Is that the first real act of mercy Vincent's ever done?

"No!" howled Eric, holding the prince so tightly, it seemed even Death itself would not be able to snatch him away. - That was a great line.
Dwynwen chapter 36 . 6/14/2013
The aged but oaken witch hunter grabbed Prince Charming's limp body and punched him hard in the gut. - Good thinking!

the Maroon Dragoons systematically chopped off the docile heads of the Chk'lid soldiers until none were left alive. - They're just as brutal as the Ghost Council.

"I trust you," she said. - Too bad that's what it took for trust to happen between them.

I don't know who is the bigger monster in this chapter - the Ghost Council or Vincent.
Dwynwen chapter 35 . 6/11/2013
Little Prince, you owe your life the royal family owe their lives to none other than the necromancer Sarragin Vich. - Didn't see that coming.

In his quest to become king in a matriarchal society where rulership is passed from queen to queen - Oh, so that's why Nixia is the rightful heir!

Haha, spirit, iseewhatyoudidthere! - I did too.

the Deathly July, the hellish army of spinning skulls. - That sounds completely terrifying!
Dwynwen chapter 34 . 6/11/2013
The witch hunter named William expired with a small smile on his lips - So he wanted to die?

The man was short and lean, with intense, light coloured eyes and a rugged charm, the kind of charm that Prince Charming had always hoped to project. - I like your description of him!

Adam Loving fascinates me.

She just showed you the Chk'lid equivalent of the middle finger! - That's putting it very mildly. If it were Adam, I think she would have done something.

I struck a deal with it - ...He WHAT?
Dwynwen chapter 33 . 6/11/2013
You need no mother now. I can serve you better as a killer. - Yes, but in a way, she's also his conscience. Without her thoughts, feelings and emotions, they're all in trouble.

Why did she have to leave me? Why do I get blamed for it? I'm the victim here - a) She chose to save you. b) Because it's your fault. c) No, Vincent, you really aren't.

Will may be harsh, but he does have a point.

Vincent, I know you that you are down and out, and feeling really crappy...But when I see how sad you are, it sort of makes me... pissed off, so lighten up, brother. - Well, that's one way of saying 'snap out of it'.

This curse turns his internal torment external, and puts his inner feelings at ease. Now he is no longer beholden to her, and his life is his own. - Vincent, you selfish jerk!

the three most destructive spells in the world were all discovered by accident. - Why do I have a feeling Vincent is going to learn that the hard way?
Dwynwen chapter 32 . 6/7/2013
Oh no, it's the Fool.

I teach the children to play the Hunger Games - That sounds like the Fool. I haven't actually read the books properly or seen the film, but the whole concept is pretty scary.

Is being deathly april his prison? - That would be a good twist!
Dwynwen chapter 31 . 6/7/2013
Vincent was heartbreakingly aware of how weak his feelings were, compared to Sasha's. What good could words do now, in light of his own actions? - Probably not a lot of good. The fact that he would make the same choices again says a lot about his character.

Still screaming, Prince Charming woke up in his cot, soaked in cold sweat - You had me worried for a moment there!

Uh-oh. This doesn't look good.
Dwynwen chapter 30 . 6/4/2013
Stop talking, Vincent. You're making things worse.

Despite his love of Sasha, there was no room in Vincent's vision for self-sacrifice - Yeah. That's his problem. True self-sacrifice is selfless, and that's the one thing Vincent will probably never be.

I will not leaf without her! - Did you mean I will not *leave* without her?

If anyone can save Vincent, it's Sasha.
Dwynwen chapter 29 . 6/4/2013
That might be because you have the word 'elf' in the chapter title!

At the same time the stress and worry that she had been experiencing throughout the journey slipped from her mind like a fading dream exposed to sunlight. - Oh my gosh, that was beautiful.

He's undead. Elf magic gives all things peace. I'm currently helping to kill him, slowly and painlessly. - For the undead, that would be a blessing, I think.

The tree took on a wooden expression. - Wait...

So now Nixia is as deadly as she is beautiful.

Mariah didn't mention it, but she was already using her own magic to preserve Vincent's life, in active defiance of elvish law and the ambient magic of her fellows. - I like Mariah.

...Wow. I don't know what to say to that. Sasha is sacrificing her own life to save Vincent but at the same time, she's going to indirectly cause the destruction of thousands of innocents.

Is she ever going to be Vincent's salvation?
Vallucast chapter 6 . 5/25/2013

I can imagine the zombies clearer after watching 'silent hill'..and strangely not other zombie movies (virus attack or smthing). Still, i think your zombies were closer with the ones from 'the cabin'. What is your opinion?
Dwynwen chapter 28 . 5/25/2013
Although the dragon might have been incapable of learning humility, his painful education had certainly taught him that he was not invulnerable. - Good thing Smaug didn't learn that lesson.

Blind," he rasped. "Blind. I am blind. Oh no. Oh, no - I do feel slightly sorry for Illexmann here.

There is truth in many of the old tales - Great quote!

Elves are pretty much the most benevolent species that exist. They are sentient symbiotes that live in the forest. They spend their lives nurturing their hosts and have never been known to hurt another living creature. In fact, they are famous for their benevolence and their healing magic, which borders on the miraculous - I like the sound of your Elves!

Would that weakness - Slight bug fix?

Never, she thought to herself, setting her mouth grimly. I'll choose death before I abandon him. - Sasha is becoming one of the strongest characters in the story! I really like her - and Adam Loving.
Dwynwen chapter 27 . 5/25/2013
Heartseeker sounds absolutely terrifying.

There is a human intelligence beneath it. And humans are easily tricked, particularly if they are overconfident - Like Vincent.

You blinded it with your rage and weakened it with your recklessness - Vincent has very dangerous weaknesses.

For a moment, Sasha coldly met Shon Kingston's ferocious gaze - That must have been quite a moment!

I know exactly who would appreciate getting his hands on such technology - Does he mean the Engineer?
Dwynwen chapter 26 . 5/25/2013
It is fitting that you witch hunters should be the one to take his head - Yeah. I don't think that's going to happen.

Thankfully you listened to me and used a zombie as a decoy instead. - Vincent clearly needs Will a lot if he's going to survive. He strikes me as someone who always needs advice.

Vincent was quickly learning to treat his mortal enemies with contempt - Not a wise move. He can't afford to become arrogant.

Vincent continued to stretch his new abilities to the very limit, attempting the most ambitious spell he had ever done in his life. - No! Don't do that!
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