Reviews for Just Another Night on the Job
Lizzy chapter 4 . 11/7/2012
Thank you for updating! I love this story, please update again as soon as possible! :)
Cayaa chapter 4 . 11/5/2012
Haha yay an update, glad your back :D I liked this chapter of course, although the time changes were a bit confusing and I got a bit lost D: It was still good all in all :)

Haha, it's kinda cool that Xaylik has the same last name as me xD

Hope you update soon :D
Daneeno chapter 4 . 11/4/2012
This story is truly amazing, I cant wait to see what happens next!
Daneeno chapter 1 . 11/4/2012
I love Teal's name considering that's like the best color ever, wonderful story.
GHOST-Sherri chapter 4 . 10/31/2012
This story is amazing, truly. I look forward to what happens next. Please please please update soon?
DarksideOfTheMoon342 chapter 2 . 8/4/2012
Wow, that was a great chapter!
Guest chapter 3 . 7/22/2012
This chapter was great. When he said 'I was going to get laid. By a normal penis.' I could not stop laughing. He got laid alright xD
BandNerd98 chapter 3 . 7/22/2012
Lol i loved Xay he seems awesome hehe and i wonder what Natan will do lol he will probably be jealous haha
BandNerd98 chapter 2 . 7/22/2012
Lol i find nothing wrong with it at all it actually sounds absolutely perfect and i still love this story!
BandNerd98 chapter 1 . 7/22/2012
That'sa really good way to start off a story i really really love it and wow this is your first attempt lol you sound like your an expert at writing it and if this was your first attempt then i can't wait to read even mor of your yaoi work i really did love it :D good work
GreenGrass1 chapter 3 . 7/22/2012
This line - "I walked so... homosexually" cracked me up for some reason, I don't know why. For your first attempt at writing yaoi, I think your sex scenes are pretty good!
Honunjama chapter 2 . 7/16/2012
'Ever noticed that few minutes in the morning, just as you wake up were you can't remember anything and everything is right in the world?' there is word for that feeling...I think...but I can't remember it or even where I heard that fact, sorry...:P

Hey, this is really interesting, so now poor Teal is the maid and feeling all jealous aww

I think Greengrass1 mentioned this also- about just making it a little clearer who is speaking, and separating it from the reaction to the speech- but it's a really easy fix

Keep going! looking forward to more:)

GreenGrass1 chapter 2 . 7/15/2012
I like this chapter. I like that Teal has a little bit of a sharp edge, you know?

I have a suggestion: I usually like to group the dialogue with the action of the character. Then start a new paragraph when the other character responds. I think it's neater maybe? Example:

The sight awaiting me in the kitchen certainly set my dribbling off again: a half-naked Adonis with enticing, armpit-length dark curls cooking me breakfast and pointing a dazzling grin at me.

"Good morning, beautiful. Finally awake, I presume?"

I pouted. "What do you mean finally? I have been banging the floor for ages in the hopes that you'd come up and save me from it!"

He raised an elegant eyebrow. "It being the floor? And how, pray tell, had the floor captured you?"

I scoffed and cocked a hip. "Well if I can't get off the floor and nothing is holding me down, surely there's no other explanation except for the floor having captured me, right?"

His low, husky laugh shivered straight through me.

Unless I read it wrong and I associated the wrong dialogue with the wrong character. If I did, just ignore this comment.

Thanks for the update. Keep 'em coming.
Cayaa chapter 2 . 7/14/2012
You're welcome for reading it xD. Teal? Jealous? Whaaaatt who would say such a thing? (lol). Oh and btw, I didn't think the first few paragraphs were better then the rest the entire fic was all written well to me.

Oh and you better have passed your exams! ;D
Honunjama chapter 1 . 7/10/2012
Gosh that was quite brutal, and you didn't shy away from any details, which is the way you've got to do it writing a story like this!
It's certainly interesting! :)

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