|Reviews for Violet Hill|
| trying to delete chapter 1 . 7/23/2012
I will admit I was a tiny bit confused with some parts of this, but I'm okay with that. Then again, I am the weird kind of reader who sometimes likes that vague feeling of confusion where you know mostly what's going on but you don't completely grasp it. Also, I think I may have found a couple of typos and some slightly confusing wording.
"...but the only thing he could think..." (did you mean to put 'of' or 'about' here?) "...was that one night he couldn't sleep..." (might make more sense if you put 'hadn't been able to' or something like that instead of "couldn't") "...and he..." (it also might make more sense to put 'had' before "wanted"; was a little confused by the tense) "...to read..."
"...he saw the cathedral where..."(did you mean to put 'there' after "where"?)"...was never one before..."
I apologize if what I typed above seems confusing or is no good.. Anyway, on to the praise :). This was very well written (as usual) and I think it very well captures the essence of a desensitized soldier who feels as if he no longer has a purpose and just wants to go back home to the ones he loves, back to the way things used to be. I also thought the constant snow was very appropriate; bleak, cold, and numbing, just like the situation the soldier is stuck in and how he feels. The emotions were strong and conveyed well (again, as usual) and I almost wanted to cry by the end of it. And the ending, oh the ending, that was the metaphorical cherry on top. The way you ended the story just made it that much better. Keep up the good work!
P.S. I take back my earlier comment of being confused. I think I completely get it now that I've finished the review and have thoroughly thought about it. And that's another thing that I think is good about this. It made me think for a bit to truly grasp it and fully understand what was happening I like it when stories do that.
| Scarlet-SKull chapter 1 . 5/25/2012
Very romantic! :3 Well written. Was a little confused in the beginning but it made sense as I read through. Keep on writing!
| marionking chapter 1 . 3/12/2012
Oh wow, this is so beautiful, I'm at a loss for words. I love it. I'm so glad I had the chance to read it and that you shared it on FP.
You write wonderfully. It's rare to come across something of such quality.
Keep up the great work.