I’ve never cried so much at any medium before... I love-hate you for this, it’s strange... so many emotions. Gonna cry myself to sleep contemplating what death and love mean now. Well played, you win this one.

Plese dont stop writing i love it too much to describe it in words im a crying mess now

Wow I've never cried so hard reading a book before, these characters felt so real and you've done a beautiful is the most amazing story I've ever read

it was a great story love it

This is a great story. I enjoy the depth in the characters. It feels like both Isabella and Haruka are good people entrapped by their bad deeds. Really enjoyable read. I blazed right through this chapter

I was actually putting off reading the last 2 chapters of this story. But then another story I was reading suddenly turned toxically bad, and was sticking to mind like tar, so I read these last 2 chapters, and their greatness cleaned the tar right out (in a flood of saltwater). So, sincerely, thank you for that. This story is probably one of the best I've ever read, published or not.

Though, just so I can say I was constructive: The countdown in the final battle was kind of cheesy :P

Bravo,your story is well written, emotional but not in the easy way,your gallery of characters is impressive,each of theme give a strong impression. Pirate ,ninja, ange,demon,this diversity is the best way for a very bad story,yet you have the skill to make a very good story. Bravo.
*sorry for my english.

A truly sweet and emotional chapter :).

I enjoyed the well written battle scene in this chapter :)! A blend of fantasy/RPG elements in an epic battle!

Immediately enthralled with the story :)! Such emotion and connectability to the characters and its world!

["It's even better than that, Ruki – there's no mud."]
Mud again lolol

Personally, I don't like this chapter. If it were up to me, I would have ended with the last one. That opening journal entry is pretty awesome, so I would probably keep that, but I dunno. It just feels weird. I don't know, it gets rid of the mystery, I guess? And I like having it open-ended on whether they ever meet again. That might just be me though. And I see you have a big thing about it at the end, but if it were me, I probably would have written it for myself, and then never posted it. This is probably largely up to personal style, but yeah.

Okay, overall thoughts. Sometimes, the dialog is a little awkward and unnecessary, but whenever it's not in one of those silly fights, it's almost universally awesome. Yeah, I could take or leave the fight scenes. The narration is great, some of the best I've seen on this site, even if it can be a little awkwardly worded on the rare occasion.
The characters are awesome, unique and cliched at the same time. For me, it's always the characters and worldbuilding that carry a story, and this story does okay in the second and excels in the first. Some of it could have been a little better, but I'm worried that if things were to be changed, it would ruin the whole dynamic. The way it is just now works so well I can't even. I love pretty much everything about Haruka and Isabella (and Freya), and they completely make the story. It's just awesome, the whole thing.

This is my favorite story on FP, and probably one of my favorite stories I've ever read. Not at the top of the list, but in there. It's not very often things make me cry, especially after I was put on my drugs. I'M TOO BUTCH FOR THIS DAMMIT. If this were to be published (in like, actual physical book form) I would definitely buy it. And I don't buy a lot of books xD

In summary: Fucking awesome.

Okay I'm already crying a little ; _ ;

Freya the drunken therapist to the rescue!

[ "Stay."]
I started laughing. And it moved immediately into crying ; _ ;

I can't stop crying ; _ ; fuck you, sir xD I can barely even see the screen.
By all my crying, you must be able to tell how I feel about this chapter. I don't even know what to say. It's just so...fiwedaoshdfulxkzhfds. I wish I will ever be able to make someone feel with my own writing as strongly as this affects me. I probably never will, though. I don't think I'm as good as you.
Okay, I'm gross. I need to go wash my face before the next chapter. Be right back.

I hate wedding scenes in books ._. Actually, I just hate weddings xD
...*is totally gonna write one in Broken*

["Really now? What about inappropriate advances? Say… Aimed at you?"
"What makes you think they're inappropriate?"]
Oh god, make this happen xD

["So… Mud… My old nemesis… We meet again,"]
lolol

Okay this almost made me cry again ; _ ;
Good chapter, in pretty much every way. There were wordings in a couple places that were a little awkward, but they did in no way detract from the narration. Yeah, good chapter. I know I don't have a lot to say, so yeah.

[...decimating the guards in her way.]
You know what, it bugs me every time you use that word. It's not just you doing it though. Decimation was a policy of the Roman Empire, where punished soldiers would draw lots and stone to death every tenth person. It really means to reduce by one tenth. So it bugs me every time people incorrectly use it to mean "completely destroy". I don't know why, it just does.
You can probably ignore this though xD

[Each new their limits and presented...]
Whoops. "knew"

[...they knew that if she was here...]
"were"

omg Haruka/Bella always makes me giggle xD

[...then grabbed her wrist and turned her back...]
I'm pretty sure that first one is supposed to be "his"

I don't like how Haruka speaks when killing Aranea.

That transformation of Reis/Faust's is just so cliche I can't even.

[...she placed Death Marks on his wrist, multiple of them...]
That is super awkward. "many" is better.

This was pretty much one long action scene, and you know how I feel about those. It was clear enough. Probably could have been better, but it was pretty good. That dialog was kind of annoying me again, but oh well. I do like how you finished the chapter with a punch line, though. That was good.
But yeah. Yay, the bad guys are dead. Ding dong etc. Now hopefully we can have some of the good stuff :D

["Ruki, don't make me sound crazy."]
omg lolololol I can't breathe xD

[Hours Later]
heeheehee

[If she was to die soon...]
"were"

["Pff, reality is for crazy people."]
I can't breathe again.

[Four long tables sat in the middle, each lined with stools on either side.]
*thinks of Hogwarts* .

[...as if the room was full of people...]
"were"

I know what happened. ZOMBIES. That's what happened.
Just a normal chapter again. I don't really know what to say. Funny dialog. Narration adequate in some places but good in most. The scene with the golem was a little awkward, but that's okay. Maybe could use a little fixing up before publishing. But yeah. Good chapter. I laughed like crazy a couple times. That Bella xD
omg I am so sleepy why