Reviews for Fated
Pantu chapter 5 . 1/20
I'm reviewing this one as a separate story, because it kind of is.
Nick was definitely less irritating in this one, maybe because he's older, maybe because he had less time to mope in denial. The pacing was good, and the s*x scenes were nicely mixed up so they didn't get boring.
But still another excellently written story,
-Pantu
Pantu chapter 4 . 1/20
Hey there,

I really enjoyed this, although I have to say, Nick is a winy little b***h. It was fun and enjoyable to read and you write really nicely. My one issue was the big chunk of Nick walking from the portal to the city to find Arian in this chapter. It was a little drawn out and even though you write beautifully I found myself wondering when he would get there. I get that its about giving him time to change and adapt, I just felt it could have been condensed. The rest of it is excellent, even the parts you said you needed to go back and change, and I hope you're still working on your WIP pieces because I'd love to read more of your stuff.

Thanks for sharing, (and messaging me so I could stalk you back :P)
-Pantu
XxDangerousPleasuresxX chapter 4 . 12/21/2013
This wonderful, albeit short, story has put me through painful years and unbelievable happiness. I love stories with alternate universes and this one does not disappoint. I may have got a little frustrated with Nicks ignorance at times but that just developed his character and made the feelings in the story all the more intense. I would really like to see some kind of epilogue. I do hope I'm not too late and you're no longer looking to make one. Thank you so much for this story and I hope to hear back from you. :)
Jenny
andy chapter 4 . 9/25/2013
pleeeeeaaaaaseeee? epilogue?
pleeeeeaaaaaseeee?
I liked the story very much, so sweet and sad at the same time.
Thanks!
Guest chapter 5 . 8/26/2013
Hngggngn please update this, your writing is awesome :D
magnanimousSquirrel chapter 4 . 8/21/2013
I've been listening to music while reading this and several songs matched up almost perfectly, like I'm Sexy and I Know It played for their first time. And I Won't Give Up by Jason Mraz played in this chapter.

Anyway.

This story was really original, I thought. And it was well put together. I didn't notice any blaring inconsistencies and it wrapped up nicely. I would like to know more about Arian's world though. Like what's this coloring poisoning? And why is everyone so naive?
GadgetGurl chapter 4 . 7/21/2013
Read the whole story in one go, thought it was quite good. Have to say, I think Nick is a bit of an ass, although he redeems himself in the end. But then, I don't really have a thing for characters in denial so it's probably just me. Arian really got me though; for most of the story I was kind of thinking that he was a bit too sensitive (crying. um...), but in the end he was brutally honest about his fears and emotions. He is a very well-developed character.
The descriptions of Eralis were a little vague but very enticing. I would like to see more about this world :-)
Kaila Azroth chapter 5 . 7/5/2013
I really wished you did another chapter dedicated to Evan having his way with Nick. Would have been tottally cool if Cedar and Evan did him both, but still your story is amazing!
Seriah Black Sheep chapter 4 . 5/8/2013
This story really stuck in my head. I mean, REALLY stuck. I read it a couple months ago, and I still remember all of it!

I loved your creativity with the golds and silvers and the color poisoning, and I loved Nick's journey to find Arian. Nick's confusion about how to respond to Arian felt so realistic. But my favorite part was by far the beginning (which I don't think I've ever actually said about a story before). I liked how the portal to Arian's world was unprecedented, how Nick's curiosity led him there and how he just got swept along. My favorite scene was actually that first sex scene, because of the setting, because of Arian's warmth, and because of the star. It set the tone for the whole story...and made it so I thought I was going to DIE in chapter 4 if Nick didn't get to Arian in time! So sad about Arian crying out in his sleep. SO sad. :'(
morningstorm70 chapter 4 . 5/7/2013
OMG you almost had me crying in this chapter
gotta say it's my fav chapter though
lovesyoumore chapter 5 . 2/18/2013
Completely amazing story! Cant wait to read more of your work.
foreveran chapter 5 . 2/11/2013
I havent read this extra chapter yet though I'm sure its as amazing.
I was just wondering on your plans for the epilogue, is it still in the works?
As for Fated it was such a lovely read I really loved hated and sympathized with Nick and Arian was such a perfect man that Nick should have gobbled up from the beginning. Anyways I loved everything the world you created (which I wish I knew more of) and the lovely couple whom I hope continue to be happy and make lots of love! :P Thank you for sharing a beautiful story, I cannot wait to check your other stories :D
foreveran chapter 4 . 2/11/2013
I was really happy to see and learn more about Arian world I was glad you made them a week apart so Nick could get accustomed to the new world.
lol at everyone thinking he has colour poising its always cracks me up especially when Nick asks Arian had awww
As much as I love Arian and Nick of course it going to take some time for Arian to fully trust Nick and I'm glad you should that when he would wake up and tighten his hold on Nick
Such a wonderful story I'm off to the epilogue!
foreveran chapter 3 . 2/11/2013
omg I was so sad he was changing and forcing himself to be something he wasn't
ughh Ben boys are so stupid humans in general and about being gay is so dumb and not accetping its sad
I'm so glad Nick realized what he wanted and he told his team he was gay and that they didn't beat him up but just told him to go
omg I cannot wait for them to reunite its going to beautiful as long as Arian will forgive him
ahh Im so excited!
foreveran chapter 2 . 2/11/2013
omg Tyler I flippin hate him omg! zk;fagajksgfajksf
ahhh Nick why are you torutring the sweet boy!
omg what do you mean fix the sex? it was so damn good!
ahh Nick just go with Arian hes so sweet, lovely and perfect omg so perfect!
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