Reviews for Regrets
Rogue Energizer Bunny chapter 4 . 6/13/2012
Cedar Point?


I like this! Nice cliffhanger. UPDATE SOONER THIS TIME. *angry face*

walls-have-ears chapter 4 . 6/13/2012
That was sad, and you kind of left at a cliffhanger, I think.

However, I thin you made it go a bit too fast, like it didn't flow slow enough for me to emphasise him. I'm not exactly an expert on this stuff but I'm just saying.

All in all i still liked it, can't wait for the next chapter!
TinfoilKnight chapter 1 . 5/17/2012
Do I have time to review three chapters? Eh, who da heck knows. I'll probably finish this story tomorrow.

Well, you've got some tense changes... has REB already given you the tense speech? I'll ask her tomorrow. Just work on keeping the tense either past or present, have someone proofread if it helps.

I like the direction you went with the police officer asking him to be a witness. It's not something a lot of stories cover, even ones involving drunk driving. I definitely empathize with James at this point, and I understand his desire not to be a witness. :(

Blah, I've gotta go to bed. If I don't finish by Saturday, just PM me incessantly and I'll get to it.
Rogue Energizer Bunny chapter 3 . 5/15/2012

Best shit you've written yet.

Apart from the tense change halfway through.


walls-have-ears chapter 3 . 5/15/2012
Well that the beginning was quite sad, and for some reason I liked how you mentioned that he would never have her living in their house. The dream was definately strange and dark, I could almost picture it in my head, I love the way you described it all. Well done. The boy thing that confused me was when you switched from first person o third and vice versa. Was it a mistake or was it his thoughts? If it was his thoughts, then try and make them clearer by typing them in italics. Also, towards the end you spelt 'corps' instead of corpse, I'm not sure if it's just difference in American English to British English, so sorry if it is, but overall you made hardly any mistakes so another very good chapter, please update soon.
Rogue Energizer Bunny chapter 2 . 5/7/2012

Good expression of emotion here. *gives congratulatory hug*
walls-have-ears chapter 2 . 5/6/2012
That was quite upsetting. I like the way ou described the environment around him and the emotions. Nice chapter, looking forward to the next.
walls-have-ears chapter 1 . 5/3/2012
Interesting, I want to see where this goes. I loved the way you described looking in the mirror. Great work!