|Reviews for Death Callers|
| Miles-tails-prowler chapter 17 . 9/21/2012
| Miles-tails-prowler chapter 16 . 9/19/2012
I love it!
If this was my story "kitsune" they'd have one angry spirit fox ripping up the joint right about now! You do not want to get on the bad side of the spirit foxes from my story! Or for that matter any human they owe their lives to. XD
| Anihyr Moonstar chapter 1 . 9/14/2012
I love your opening lines. You set your character apart from the get-go. While the "I am the female grim reaper" line is a bit overdone already and ghost/vampire/succubus characters are *definitely* in that category, I can't remember reading one story on here about a banshee - so, very nice kick off. :)
[ Kaydynce was only a foot shorter than me yet she acted like she was six feet tall.] *Only* a foot shorter? xD You know a foot is a *lot* of distance when it comes to height. If you said "only an inch" that would make sense, but a foot is the difference between being really short (five foot) and pretty darn tall (six foot). Just figured I'd point that out, since it struck me as an odd thing to say.
Reading this, I'm kind of curious as to exactly what a "banshee" is in your terms, because other than the "death call" portion, the "extreme beauty" seems to suggest something more like a succubus than a banshee. In addition, in the legends, banshees are traditionally fairies or spirits, and so the presentation of them as young teenaged girls going about their life (with a school, teachers, books, boys, etc.) seems like an interesting contrast to the typical legends.
Ouch! What a cliff hanger! Poor Aislin. :( I don't suppose there's any way to avoid it, but a part of me still hopes she can somehow spare him.
| Highway Unicorn chapter 4 . 9/12/2012
Returning the review!
Awwww they kissed, so cute :D I like the monstrous side of Kay that came out in this chapter, and how she was draining the boy...very intense. Anywhos, this was a good chapter :D
| Miles-tails-prowler chapter 15 . 9/10/2012
What is with the paranormal and execution? It only creates problems down the road. especially when they have a couple of billion angry humans seeking revenge for all of the people they executed when we eventually find out.. Let's face it, we humans are a vengeful lot, and we're like cockroaches: where there's one there's bound to be more... and if you don't get all of us in one go, we'll be back.
| Loraine Wentworth chapter 6 . 9/5/2012
I think this is a great chapter. The interactions between Aislinn and her mum are both realistic and telling. You do a good job of conveying a bit of back story about her dad, too. The whole scene adds to the humanity of the characters and the realism of the story as a whole, making it much more possible to relate to the characters- a good thing in fantasy/supernatural stories.
| Loraine Wentworth chapter 5 . 9/5/2012
This is a very bitter-sweet chapter. A lot of emotion is conveyed here very effectively through some poignant character interactions.
I didn't notice any typos etc in this chapter.
| Loraine Wentworth chapter 4 . 9/5/2012
There are some good insights into Aislinn's feelings here and also Kaelin's personality, through his actions. I think the characters are very well defined here.
There might be a few missing commas in this chapter- so have a look out for those.
Anyway, a good chapter, so on to the next...
| Highway Unicorn chapter 3 . 9/2/2012
Hellos from RH! :D
*Le gasp* What kind of friend is Kaydynce? It's horrible that she seduced Kaelin when she knw Aislin liked him, and in the vision, she does it yet again? :(
I wonder who the ghost things are...and if they are of threat or freind to Aislin. They did give her the vision...but was it to help her, or make her upset over seeing her loved ones like that?
Anywhos, onto the next chapter!
| MissColly chapter 1 . 9/2/2012
Okay, in the beginning I think you should expand on the death call and banshee concept because it just seems you skipped that part. It just goes from talking about that with her friends, and then it switches to her in school and the whole banshee/death caller concept disappears until the very end of the chapter.
But anyway, I really like how you added your own twist to the commonly used plot (the one where you don't see a guy for ages, and when you do he's hot). I also liked that you described the characters appearance and personality without it sounding like you're just listing stuff about them, instead you just added it where it fits.
The ending was a perfect way to end the chapter. But I guess you already know that. But I just wanted to say that this is a very compelling first chapter, and it's one where the reader is intrigued to find out more.
| Loraine Wentworth chapter 3 . 9/2/2012
Another good chapter that I had fun reading :)
I think you do a really good job of portraying Aislin's fears and the tragedy that could happen. Her personality comes across well in the dialogue, too.
In some cases I think you could give more description, especially about the setting at the start of this chapter. This would make it easier to visualize the scenes.
| seredemia chapter 12 . 8/13/2012
i'm so glad that she's finally starting to tell kaelin now! at first i was worried that he may end up being enemies with her because she refused to tell him anything, and that he might find out on his own and get scared BUT THANK GOD THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN. i'm really liking kaelin as a character now because i like how even though he's human, he's not afraid of aislin :)
| seredemia chapter 11 . 8/10/2012
Hmm... I wonder what Kaelin is up to..? Maybe he found out what they were and now he's making everyone shun them so that they can't harm anyone? I'm not sure... but Kaelin's acting suspicious too, so I hope he won't end up being an enemy of Aislin's...
| seredemia chapter 10 . 8/10/2012
Okay. I do not like Kaydynce at all. For a minute there, I thought Teagan was going to die as well, so I'm glad Aislin managed to stop her before she did. It's sad that Aaron died though... And I can understand why Kaelin is angry. I would be too if my best friend died and I didn't know anything about what was going on...
| seredemia chapter 9 . 8/10/2012
OH MY GOD I KNEW IT. I KNEW I COULDN'T TRUST KAYDYNCE. WTF. NO. NO. AISLIN BETTER SAVE KAELIN BEFORE KAYDYNCE SUCKS HIS LIFE OUT. But wow, I loved how you wrote that vision! So freaky!