Reviews for Skating Upon Love
HopelessRomantic97 chapter 11 . 8/8/2012
Wow. REALLY good chapter! I'm glad you finally updated;) can't wait for the next chapter. And keep up the great work!
Latinoprincess chapter 1 . 7/23/2012
Great story! 'Nuff said.
HopelessRomantic97 chapter 10 . 7/19/2012
Ooh, drama :-P honestly, I like Samantha better than Nick. And Dylan better than Jason because even though he may not show it all the time, he truely cares about her and would do anything for her. Plus, he confided in her when Dylan told Samantha that Jennifer Miller was pregnant. Also, I like Timmy better than Andrew because he's a mini me of Jason and even at a young age(7 years old I think..) he makes sure she doesn't do anything they'll regret doing. I have mixed feelings for rgis one; but i think what nick did was romantic and stupid because he just wanted to impress her but it was also stupid because he should of made sure she didnt go overboard with the drinking because nick knows how samantha's brothers are anyway. I actually think Dylan would make a good dad. I think Jennifer should put the baby up for adoption because 17 is sorta young to be a parents a d most likely they're not ready for the huge responsibility of parenthood. But then again, if they're that committed, they should keep the baby because yes, its hard work but they also have a good support system. And sorry this is long!
HopelessRomantic97 chapter 9 . 7/4/2012
Oooh, drama! Love it;-) update soon please:)
mustacheman19 chapter 9 . 6/24/2012
CAT FIGHT! and who was taylors boyfriend? O.o
molhan129 chapter 7 . 6/21/2012
This story is okay. The first chapter was this, except that it isn't very realistic. After that first chapter I have no idea where you are going with this story. Develop your characters. More detail. Think to yourself. "do people go from being in love with one boy to being in love with a totally different boy in a couple of days"?
113Wishesd chapter 8 . 6/12/2012
I think that there should be more...action. Maybe get more into Jason and Mikayla, or Samantha and Nick. Maybe add Taylor back in. Get them out of the hospital. I think that you are not going to your full potential on this story. It's time to bring out the big guns. Keep up the good work ;)
113Wishesd chapter 7 . 6/6/2012
Another surprising twist. Just a suggestion, you don't have to take it, but I think that there needs to be more drama. More details, more, well, drama. Nice job;)
Whatsoever chapter 5 . 6/5/2012
I think you should give us some idea of what the characters look like. It'd be helpful :)

And I was reading your other reviews and I would like to say something regarding those.

I think there is some truth in some points. The characters need to develop a bit more, and there should be less drama, and more time between heart stopping moments, ya know? Before writing something, think, would a real life person REALLY do that? And if they did that, what impression would the reader get and is that the one that I want them to have?

But generally, I think it's a good story and I wish you all the best, and work hard on it, okay? :) Oh, and try making some paragraphs longer, put in more descriptions and stuff.

That's all, hoping for a killer next chapter :D
Whatsoever chapter 4 . 6/5/2012
Me again. I'm glad Taylor gave the money to Sam. I would have hated her if she hadn't.
113Wishesd chapter 6 . 6/2/2012
Surprising twist! i like it. now, constructive critism time. but i think that you need to add more details and drama. especiallly drama. just some suggestions. do what you want. it's your story though. keep up the good work;)
113Wishesd chapter 4 . 5/26/2012
Keep it going;)
ohmygodhello chapter 1 . 5/26/2012
So I really do like this story and while there are several errors in the plot which ruin the believability of the story, it's generally quite good. Now, just slow it down to about three times slower. When too much happens in a plot that isn't particularly connected to one drama, there isn't enough time for the characters to react in a realistic and basically human way, making your characters appear shallow and unrealistic. I agree with a previous reviewer that the cousin/Nick scenario is rather unbelievable. I know that some cousins can look alike (personally, I look nothing like mine) but it's rare that they're identical. I mean, not all siblings look really alike, let alone cousins. Also, when Nick's cousin and Jessica are caught, from what I can remember, Nick's cousin says something along the lines of 'She kissed me,' and if he was Nick's cousin, he wouldn't have been at fault for anything and have no need to defend himself. For the Nick's-identical-cousin mini-plot to work Sam and Taylor can't have known him and so he wouldn't have felt guilty for getting caught. Generally, I really like your story, but it seems as if several aspects of the plot were decided between chapters rather than pre-planned so not all of it makes sense. I'm sorry because I feel as if I'm being horrible, but you should know that this is constructive criticism meant to help. Just before I go, one thing I don't agree with is the assumptions about your age that previous reviewers have jumped to. You are a good writer - your plot just needs a bit of work, but that might have nothing to do with your age. I'm actually the age they presumed you to be and although I'm not claiming I'm a great writer, there are many people my age who are and while writing ability is bound to improve with age, just because you could be young doesn't necessarily affect your talent. Good luck with your story :)
113Wishesd chapter 3 . 5/24/2012
How are you doing all of this at like 3am? Keep on improving your skills. Keep it up!
hey chapter 1 . 5/24/2012
Hello! I'm not saying this to be mean, but this story needs a lot of work. Just by reading I can say you must be between 13 and 14 years old, maybe a little younger. When I read a story it has to capture me within the first three chapters. The first chapter is okay, but what kind of puts me off is that he is talking as if he likes her and then reveals it was only a bet, there is no hint of regret or apprehension when he talks in the first portion. Then when I read the second chapter her best friend finds out it is only a bet and does nothing, and acts normal around her after selling her loyalty. In this chapter Nick also reveals that he loves Sam, and I believe is way to fast for him to fall in love, even if you have know the person for a long time, plus boys are stupid and never admit to love within the first couple of weeks. In the third chapter you bring a totally different character, the cousin, and it does not really make sense. If he is has a cousin they might look alike but not the same, and he has been in the school for a long time then they should know who the cousin is, and lets believe for a moment he is new to the school, you should explain those things. Also, it makes little sense that her friend tells her it was only like that, best friends usually try to make it easier on you, they don't just yell it out in the middle of a hallway, they try to spare your feelings. And then at the end of the chapter Sam and Dean end up together, which is messed up because he is the best friend, and he never showed any interest in her at the beginning of the story, plus he was the one that made the bet. Plus she moved on from being "heart broken" to utterly in love with this dude. The last critique I'm giving is on the characters, you have to develop them and their personalities more. All I know about Sam, who is one of the main characters right now is that she is hot, according to Nick, and about Nick that he is a selfish asshole. I know I'm being kind of harsh, but it is only to help you improve, I know you are going to be an awesome writer, and remember the best stories in this site have been rewritten a thousand times, and as the authors grow up their stories grow along with them.
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