|Reviews for Castles Made of Sand|
| Kutiepie1 chapter 1 . 12/21/2012
You need to have shorter paragraphs.
It's not the amount of words you have. You need more spaces in between your paragraphs. You have too many blocks of words that run together. Create more white space between your words.
Paragraphs should be between 3-5 lines long, however this is not a rule.
| Nanumi chapter 1 . 6/15/2012
Split this up into two or three chapters; WALL-OF-TEXT detracts from the overall experience.
| Symphonic Rain chapter 1 . 5/25/2012
Wow this story was great, very moving and sad :( also, love that title!
One suggestion; perhaps make the paragraphs a tad shorter.
Well anyways I see you're new here; welcome to fictionpress!
Keep writing sir/madam, you are fabulous!