|Reviews for The WaterNymph|
| avalonchick5 chapter 1 . 6/15/2012
We're not sure if it was your original intent, but the format is rather poem-style and we like it. It's a sweet story (or poem) with a slight melancholy and overriding hope.
One critique: "He was his great-great-great grandfather"? We understand that it's Julian's thrice-great grandfather, but the way that's written doesn't fit in with the rest of the story. The rest of it is written in first person 'I' format, while that phrase is in third person omniscient format. And it's a bit of a mindbender if you just skim that phrase.
Just some advice - grammar errors tend to detract and spawn negativity from your readers, leaving them with a non-positive outlook on the entire story because of one rather glaring problem.
It was nice to read though, and we hope you keep writing!
Avalon and Poozie
| KatieMichelle chapter 1 . 5/27/2012
Interesting. I love the whole "nymph" idea.