|Reviews for Exposed|
| RinaJewelz chapter 1 . 7/10/2012
I liked this. Think the first section was truly beautiful. In the second section, the tense changes made it kind of awkward. I understand the tense change in the line beginning 'Because'.
However, in the line above it I can't help but feeling it should say 'will' instead of 'would' and specifically 'will i' instead of 'I would' or 'I will'. I think that changing it would make the poem flow better and more grammatically correct.
I'm aware though that there may have been a specific reason why you chose to use the word 'would', if so I think even just swapping the words so it read 'only after / would I...' instead of 'only after / I would' sounds better in my mind.
Tiny scruple. But part from that. Good work! Keep writing :)
| Boundenid chapter 1 . 5/29/2012
I love it... and that is so true. So many people will help everyone around them and then do nothing to help themselves