|Reviews for The Armageddon Scrolls|
| DarkAngelGal chapter 10 . 7/3/2012
I'm pretty sure i read this back in chapter eight...i'm very confused. How did it become chapter 11? Did you add some chapters?
| ObireMortem chapter 1 . 7/3/2012
Ah man, I love a good fantasy.
Recently joined the site myself and uploaded my own :D
Great intro, nicely described. I like a decent fight scene. Gives us readers a good clear visual image without going overboard with any poetic devices.
Anyway, you write well :D
I look forward to reading more chapters.
| Guest chapter 9 . 7/2/2012
Amazing! I love this story!
| Taz-dragon chapter 1 . 6/30/2012
Very good so far! Keep it up!
| DarkAngelGal chapter 8 . 6/27/2012
Nooo! Not VA! Lol! Anyway, King Rightousness dosen't sound so rightous. I also have a feeling that Wang Tang is only using the girl (i forget her name) and that she will end up dead because of it. If that happens, I hope Prince Charming personally kills Wang Tang himself.
| DarkAngelGal chapter 7 . 6/26/2012
Wow. I love this chapter and Nixia! But i'm confused...she have a relantionship with the magician of Wang Tang? This story is getting good!
| DarkAngelGal chapter 6 . 6/24/2012
The whole time VA came into the picture i was like: "Go VA!" I know he's the bad guy but cheer for Angels! Oh and are you trying to make God evil of something? I thought Angels that were with God were supposed to be good?
| DarkAngelGal chapter 4 . 6/22/2012
Lol! I love Kalpo now! And Prince Charming really does need to stop ppl from "honoring" him. It's only the forth chapter and i'm even annoyed by it!
| Serpent Tailed Angel chapter 7 . 6/21/2012
So Righteous was Charming's brother. Shoulda known. I don't know if you ever heard this one, but there was a guy who had a really good feeling about his seventh kid, so he named him Winner. Then as a joke he named the eighth one Loser. I think the king was kinda like that dude.
I feel like I need to make a log for all the characters. I'm sure I'll get them all down eventually. It was easier when it was just Charming's army.
Anyway, good chapter. Just a few typos (you've got a 1 where there should be a ! by the way)
Oh, in case you were wondering: Loser grew up to be a cop. His friends call him Lou. Winner's in jail, but I don't know if Loser was the one to put him there.
| Serpent Tailed Angel chapter 6 . 6/21/2012
Nixia seems like a witch with a B. She wasn't serious about that murder thing, was she? Did the name come from Nixes or is this another meme?
The Asian sounding names get a bit confusing, so I don't know if that character has shown up before, but regardless he picked an awesome way of breaking the news to her.
| Vivace.Assai chapter 1 . 6/21/2012
Okay, so I'm slightly groggy since I just woke up, but this is the only time I could find to review one chapter for this. This explanation is just a warning that I might ramble and be incoherent with half of this review.
So first, I found the writing to be once again flawless in terms of grammar. There was a point where Prince Charming spoke in all capitalized letters and I'm not sure if that is the preferred method of showing a rise in volume (since many feel it is unprofessional). But it wasn't too distinct and glaring and was used with caution so I think you're okay.
Continuing on, this chapter started nicely in a way that continued from The Baby Necromancer but also gives information that makes it easy for even a new reader to jump into the story. I enjoyed the continuity through the information and hints, but I liked how explanations were given to help fuel understanding.
I did notice you were more action focused in your narration rather than giving more imagery. Before, you rather liked to set the scene and I know a lot of people like the context and some sensory details in the first few paragraphs of the story. I wasn't quite bothered about it, since I myself tend to focus on the plot. However, I have noticed that I really enjoy reading stories where there is a moderate amount of imagery. It just transports me into the scene and I get more involved with the characters. But that's just a suggestion and maybe I'm reading too much into this first chapter. Maybe you just felt this scene didn't require imagery (which it really didn't that much).
So now onto plot and character analysis.
I like how you started with the prince waking up instead of the grieving. For new readers, they would feel no connection to the prince, so whatever happens, the readers would not feel any care for the first chapter if you started with grieving. So starting with his resurrection allows you to jump straight into the story making the plot have more dynamics. I hope there is some redone of exposition on the characters and their lives for any new readers. This will add more to the beginning, but this is a nice way to start the chapter.
As for characters, you've given a great skeleton of what the characters are like. I'm getting a good gauge of what the Prince, Boris, Kalp, and Jacob are like and how others view them. I'm not yet into their different complexities but that is for later chapters. But this is a great start in development.
Overall, a great start to the story. Really enjoying this. I'll read more later when I find more time.
| DarkAngelGal chapter 3 . 6/20/2012
Will creeps me out ALOT. The Fool is a ...Fool. Eva actually seems nice and she's a dragon, AWESOME! And i feel bad for Vincent, he was sucked into this and now he can't get out. Then again, i love tragic characters.
| Serpent Tailed Angel chapter 5 . 6/20/2012
Master Sensei. Something about that just made me laugh. I guess there is already a Prince Charming, though. I figured the vermillion angel would be helping them, but it seems not.
| Silver XIII chapter 1 . 6/20/2012
As requested, I've taken a look at your first chapter (skimmed through it, really - I haven't finished reading your other story yet). At a guess, your "problem" could be several things.
1. Your summary is less... original. It sounds more like a cheesy advertisement then the first glimpse of a grand adventure.
2. Your first chapter has less detail to it, I think. Less imagery. I haven't read it thoroughly (and do not intend to until after I finish your first "book") so I can't say anything definite.
Personally, I think your summary has a fair bit to do with it. A cast of angels, demons, etc. isn't as... interesting... as a "journey into the heart of darkness."
Of course, I'm a relative amateur so you should probably take my input with a grain of salt.
| Serpent Tailed Angel chapter 4 . 6/20/2012
The 'three bags full' bit was a little distracting. As was the 9000. Stories usually aren't a good place for memes. Kinda neat to see them planning their battle though. A lot of stories just go straight to the fight.