|Reviews for New|
| Just An Overlook chapter 4 . 6/29
Honestly, the pace and unstable mood swings of this story make me cringe but I'm hoping this will be improved later on or at least have something to do with the anonymous plot later on. I like the idea at the beginning but it seemed like as soon as Kai appeared you got impatient and decided to go in a different direction with the story all together and throw them into a cliche cocktail smoothie of bipolarity and rushed sex scenes. If I was a werewolf, I wouldn't be so quick to toss caution to the wind for a piece of new booty. There was nothing wrong with Jaden being nice but the sex just... Too soon.
But that's just my opinion.
On further review, you spell 'Your' (which shows possession) instead of 'You're' (which means 'you are') it's sadly a common mistake and if you can't remember the difference try making a sentence using both like: "Your hair is lovely, you're going to turn some heads!"
Overall, it'd be nice to see this story when you grasp the concept. It never hurts to plan before you write, if the reviewers/readers as well as yourself care enough about this story, they'd know a good story takes time and wouldn't mind if you took a week or two planning out each chapter and carefully checking over your mistakes before posting. However; if this was all just for the sake of making boys kiss and you had no intention of actually becoming serious about your work(s) then I apologize for my intrusion, but hope you will consider the advice anyway because I really would want to read this.
| AkeraWriterOfTheNight chapter 16 . 1/24/2014
I hate when the characters stop talking to me. So many of my own stories are stopped because of it. I hope you, jaden and Kai get along soon. I also hope to have more stories of Tara up once I move them from my old computer to my new one. Keep me posted on what's going on!
| Luna Schlee chapter 16 . 1/22/2014
I hope you can pull through soon. I know how u feel
| AnimalLover411 chapter 16 . 1/21/2014
How about they go to Tara and Maka's home. There they stay until the end of the pregnancy (with flashbacks or whatever of the whole thing) and in a chapter or two, the litter is born? Of maybe between 2 and 5 kids?
| Guest chapter 15 . 12/6/2013
I love u! Its so good!
| Luna Schlee chapter 15 . 12/6/2013
jeez I was wondering when you were going to update again! But, this may just be my favorite chapter yet!
| AkeraWriterOfTheNight chapter 14 . 11/28/2013
-paws at expectantly- hey where is the chappy you twas witin!?
| Guest chapter 14 . 11/28/2013
Please start writing again! I'm digging your story! You can't leave it like this...I NEED MORE! PLEASE AND THANK YOU! :-)
| luc chapter 14 . 11/16/2013
is getting better and better...please update soon...
| Guest chapter 14 . 11/14/2013
Love this chapter, adore this story...please don't stop updating!
| Angel Raksha Akasha Flame chapter 5 . 10/8/2013
| AkeraWriterOfTheNight chapter 15 . 10/3/2013
OH SHNAP! :D THIS WAS EPIC! MORE PLEASE! :D
| Guest chapter 15 . 10/3/2013
I truly love this story and especially this chapter I wanted to say dun dun duuuun at the end. Can't wait for the next chapter I hope we get to know more about Kai's family as well as more of jadens. : )
| AnimalLover411 chapter 15 . 10/3/2013
its amazing! especially with Kai's father knowing Jaden's dad. and the crush! omg suspense!
| Luna Schlee chapter 14 . 10/3/2013
it's fine. just hurry! PUHLEEEEASE!