|Reviews for Zero Hour|
| Moonlit Demise chapter 30 . 9/27/2013
So this was another exceedingly amaing chapter. Yay! More Alion! :D I can't wait until the next chapter in which Orion shoud give Aly a big kiss! :D Update soon!
| Anon chapter 29 . 9/14/2013
I did the math, and your story so far would fill around 700 A5 pages with narrow margins. Might be time to consider wrapping it up?
| Moonlit Demise chapter 29 . 9/11/2013
Wow! I don't know what to say. This story has taken me several days to read becuse your chpters are so aweomely long. Soo, now begins the boring, horribly writen review writen by... ME!
Things I love bout this story:
How long the chapters are
Each and every character
The auhor's notes
Couples I ship:
Couples I definately DO NOT ship:
Couples I'm Meh with:
Suggestions: The only thing is dialogue hould be in these: "dialogue". This: ' is an apostrophy.
Conclusion: This is amazing! Five and a half stars!
That's it! I'm sorry for any of the misspellings in my review but I'm writing this on my kindle. So anyways, that's just about it! Update soon.
| Hungergamezluver chapter 29 . 9/7/2013
This was such a beautiful chapter. I would like to start it off by saying I love the voice in orions head I wished he did kiss her but maybe that will happen in the upcoming chapter. Hopefully. Scarlett is so mean it was so sad to read about how ally was upset lucky Orion came and helped her. Mina did a great thing telling Lyra if only she showed more attention for mason I felt like he was left out. Like ally I have two left feet I never really understood why it was left instead of right as well. I want Tora I wished Toby went in with Lyra but what he thought of her when he saw her in the dress was cute. I hope Lyra tells everyone the visions she saw. And as for Seb and jinx hopefully there is more if them in the next chapters. Keep updating :)
| Orion Ehra chapter 29 . 9/5/2013
The best part about these conversations, is that I can't remember what I said last time, so I piece it together with what you write. It makes it more interesting.
I think my questions were answered, and there's nothing I can really reply to here.
Spelling should be the same, but grammar may be different.
When they genetically alter pigs to fly? So you don't believe they have already?
Pity is for the weak.
From what I have read, Scarlett herself is not particularly intellectual, and I find that at least a few intellectual males find sluts to be a turn off. Of course I cannot speak from experience, but books and television have taught me well.
War does sound full, all that brutal disemboweling with guts and the occasional piece of grey matter flying around … although it would be loud … I'm conflicted
Dominatrix … wait … I think I know that one (The internet may have helped). Contributes to the slut thing you've been pointing out about her. Also, I realised what the thing I said before could sound like after reading the article thingy, and to be clear, it was
Was she dragging, or pulling? These words produce two distinctly different images.
Exams. Yours may be over, but I as of yet have one other.
I shall be expecting dissection. One cannot simply have mad scientists without dissection.
Fair thee well also, my lady ... s,
Ser Orion of House Ehra
| Hungergamezluver chapter 28 . 8/1/2013
AWESOME CHAPTER! It was great I loved it when Lyra and Toby were talking and she pecked him on the cheek Tora is so cute at the moment. Ally's family are crazily cool (you understand what I mean) they were such a delight to read and I knew Mina and Sera would get along just fine. I loved it when Orion arrived at Ally's house especially when he saw her finally he was surprised. Jinx seems to have a little crush on Mina a very little one like this is the spark of a crush and as for Seb I'm so glad he is like how he was hope he is like that in future chapters. THIS CHAPTER WAS GREAT! Can't wait for the next one. Keep updating
| one who turns chapter 28 . 7/29/2013
Fun story! I'll admit, it's pretty cheesy at times, and highly unrealistic, but it's just so delightful! I can see you falling into the 'Mary Sue' traps, but I don't mind that much because it's got a fun plot to it. Besides, I know for sure my older stuff is similarly random/ridiculous, so I shouldn't judge. )
It does definitely need some spelling/grammar correction, though, for little things like using "I" vs "me," or "to" vs "too." Just a few things that can get distracting. I would go through and edit it all (yeah, I do that sort of thing, editing as a hobby), but you've got two authors so I'm sure you don't need yet another opinion. XD
I'm still happy to see what comes next, though! %3Pr
| one who turns chapter 27 . 7/29/2013
I think you meant emancipated, not exempted. %5Pr
| Anneka chapter 28 . 7/24/2013
oh my GOODNESS this entire chapter was so shippy
I swear you do this to hurt me
BUT IT'S SO GOOD DON'T STOP I HEART THEM ALL
Toby and Lyra are actually my favourites ok I just want them to get married already
AND ORION DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO DATE OMG I LOVE HIM
I think Mina and Ally are very sweet as friends :) and I like how Mina makes clothes.
The interrogation scene was very funny :)
Love how Jinx looked stunned at Mina making her own clothes :) I just think they should date
ORION OH MY GOODNESS "Wow." I CAN'T HANDLE THIS ADORABLENESS
I LOVE HOW JINX JUST LOVES MINA SECRETLY AND WE ALL KNOW IT
| Orion Ehra chapter 28 . 7/24/2013
It was within the hour? I would have thought I was a few days out at least. Optimistic about what? Should I be concerned about something?
Thank you for the species.
Oh well, at least I tried to identify them.
Now that I know that it could have been anyone, I've decided it's to much effort to continue the search. You win this round whomever you may be.
Also, Ray was only mentioned. Wait, I've mentioned him before right? Although technically he is only just now a recurring secondary character, as before it was a one off.
Now, as usual, onto the chapter review.
They can all wear Toby’s jacket? Shouldn't they have different sizes? I like the teleportation.
Still don’t get relationship stuff … or make up ... or dresses ... this chapter has me much more confused then most before it. I don't expect you to explain any of this, but I think that's why I've had less positive reviews then others. It's had a lot about relationships, which has left me confused each time.
The interrogation didn't seem so bad. It could have been much more interesting, and when I say interesting, I probably mean things everyone else would prefer not to read, so I'll let that slide.
Which love song?
I finally found out what "shipping" is. I don't see why others keep including it in their reviews, and I shan't start.
Finally, you two don't seem to be replying to the reviews together any more, it's more taking turns now. What's wrong? Was there a falling out?
| Hungergamezluver chapter 27 . 7/15/2013
BEAUTIFUL CHAPTER! I loved it so much it was well written and yes I absolutely love the part with Toby and Lyra and like Lyra I'm shocked Toby is still a virgin too all these girls throw them self at him, but I like hearing that he's a virgin it makes it seem that when he is in a relationship he's actually looking for the one instead of having "fun" as they say. I don't know who I ship harder Tora or Allion by the way I love when both Ally and Orion told their families about the JROCT ball, Ally's family is so funny same with Riley. Glad Jinx has finally realized how mean he is being and I wonder if Mina will forgive him in the future and as for Seb well I will see next time. I'm so happy hearing you two will make a number two I can't get enough of these chapters and I lover hearing from both of you as much as you like hearing from your reviewers. Keep updating :D
| Orion Ehra chapter 27 . 7/13/2013
I have to say, looking back on that review I'm surprised. There's emotion in there I didn't realise I could fake. Although it was mild It was still difficult to read it in the emotionless way that I feel.
Now, Karma, what species of parrot is it? I would like to know.
With Jinx's three unique ones, I could thing of a possibility as to what two of them would be. One could be Slender Man (the first one that is), and the last one could be the monster in spirited away, it is a creature that looks like a shadow with a mask.
Still don't get relationships.
Orion is attractive? Now I'm less and less sure how similar I am to him. But as I still know little about Mason I will stick with being Orion Ehra.
Also, it's saddening that you don't know what I said, even if you can guess. Now I don't even know where I went wrong, so it'll be like treading on egg shells. Doing random things, and hoping none of it is bad in some way.
Whoever removed my post, could you please tell me what was in it that made it worthy of tearing down? If you don't, there is a good chance I'll do it in the future, as I have trouble changing habits, so if I don't know what to change, this cycle will start all over again. Thank you mysterious stranger.
Now that I think about it, is it even possible for someone other then the author to take down reviews? Knowing this would potentially narrow the list of those I need to question.
| Orion Ehra chapter 26 . 7/12/2013
Hey, my comment got taken down. I can't remember what I said, and I really don't want to try to make another one. If you happen to have a copy of it or can remember any of what it said you can use that. This actually saddens me, I'd gone for so long without getting a review torn down, I feel like I've failed somehow, as a reviewer and a man. I say these in the loosest possible terms of course. I probably mentioned something about being confused about relationships, maybe even something about the Toby thing, and most likely made a witty reply to that thing you did at the bottom of the chapter, and did something that showed me in a queer and yet somewhat flattering light. If any of this is true I'll be surprised. Also, if it turns out it's just my computer failing, and my comment is actually there, please ignore this one. If you can't remember or never knew what was in my review, make it up and respond to that, or simply say some random things at the bottom, I have so been enjoying these conversations I feel we've had over these past few months.
| Hungergamezluver chapter 26 . 7/10/2013
LOVE IT! I hope Toby gets better and I absolutely love when he went to lyra's apartment in the back of my head I kept saying kiss her kiss her repeatedly, Tora sounds really good :). I hope things gets better at home for Seb it's not fair on him. hey dad, I'm alive I couldn't stop laughing and yes he has strange sleeping patterns. No jinx or ally but that's alright next chapter. By the way are you updating every Wednesday? This story is so wonderful I don't want it to end but when it does :( are you considering to do a number 2 maybe? Just a thought. I love this story than some books I think I love it so much is because of the characters. Like I've hardly read or came across a character like Lyra or Orion, Toby I've read a character like him once or twice same as Mina and seb but ive never read a character like jinx or ally that's why I love them so much their so unique remember being unique is being different and that's the best thing you could be. Lovely chapter can't wait for the next one :D
| Brainyuck chapter 7 . 7/7/2013
Wow, incredible. Simply incredible.
I feel like I have to stop after each chapter and read it again, just so I can begin to grasp all the effort and hard work you must have put into this beautiful story.
The way you introduce each character seperately and still keep the relationships between them so natural and yet so special, it's just amazing. I also love how convincing every single character is, how you always have them do and say exactly what is needed to line out their personality while still keeping up that unexpected, surprising facet which makes the story so worth reading.
What impressed me the most, though, are the dialogues, especially the ones between Lyra and Orion. They're just flat out brilliant, really, just brilliant.
I wish I knew you guys in person. I really do.