Reviews for The Monster Among Us
Natalia Stigaylo chapter 3 . 9/15/2012
I'm pretty interested after reading what you've written so far. I actually kind of feel bad for Dennis. Even though he's crazy, I guess I'm pretty sympathetic for him. As for some advice, just keep writing, revising, and doing your research and you'll have a great story on your hands.
T.N.M.M.Q chapter 2 . 7/28/2012
I love this story, it is well put together and very intresting. But I wish you would make you chapters a little longer.
SimonClemens chapter 2 . 7/28/2012
As the other reviewer said, do your research about asylums and psych wards. If this is modern, it's illegal. Clarify what time period this is. And, try to pace yourself. I feel like the story was being flung at me rather than actually reading it. Try keeping the manic-ness to the narrator, who cannot stop talking about how insane he is.
WE GET IT, he's nuts.
RobGravesOfficial chapter 1 . 7/27/2012
This kind of reminded me of things I use to write. Whether that's good or bad, I suppose, is up to you. I do have a few suggestions. The most prominent one being to research your subject matter. I understand that this is fiction, and you as the writer can do as you please, but if you are going for any amount of realism, you should look into asylum/closed community life. There have been laws prohibiting the conduct you've described for twenty years. You may consider changing it, or mentioning that the period if the story is before laws protecting disabled persons were passed. Again. Just suggestions.