|Reviews for dementia|
| Austin F chapter 1 . 9/22/2012
Great poem! Over all it flowed well and really set the mood. The only gripe I have on this really is that you have a rhyme scheme and you just stop using it when you go from dilemma to terror. It seems small but it can really interrupt the flow which is important for a poem. Same with using me twice but that is not quite as bad.
| dragonflydreamer chapter 1 . 9/11/2012
Congrats on third place in the Review Marathon! Here's your prize review:
I love how you broke my expectations right off the bat. Of course, seeing the title, I was expecting something relating to the disease, but as soon as you used the word "righteous," I was thrown for a loop. Nice awareness of the power of your word choice.
Sometimes, the structure of this lost me. It felt a little too systematic, introducing a topic and then addressing a feeling. But I really liked how disconnected they all were because it was where the whole feeling of dementia really came into the piece.
[my subconscious waits for you.] I love this line. The meaning is interesting and complex - after reading this once through, I came back to this line and re-read it a few times to let it sink in.
[The sound of footsteps,/sweet release.] Great ending. Bringing in the actual description of the release combined with the release of the imagery in the quiet footsteps was an interesting tone to end on.
| The Autumn Queen chapter 1 . 8/6/2012
I love the line [shadow of a rainbow] because it's beautiful and yet haunting at the same time. There are some others, like callous laughter, but that's my favourite.
I don't like the rhyming structure of this piece because it reads rather forced. Particularly the second and fourth lines...that last one was a little too long to impart any real impact.
| Purplemonkey123 chapter 1 . 7/22/2012
This poem rhymes and it flows nicely i loved it!
| DappledKarma chapter 1 . 7/22/2012
Very nice flow, paired with great imagery and great structure. I love it!
| Aerith Rei chapter 1 . 7/20/2012
Thank you for your very sweet review of "Argyle!" I loved this poem. The imagery, rhyming, and flow of it were similar to being lost in a dream. Fantastic job!
| Natari Mirumura chapter 1 . 7/18/2012
Lovely! I love the rhyming, and the flow of this poem. Very soothing. Keep it up :D