Reviews for Prom Date
Weird Girl 14 chapter 1 . 4/17/2014
Okay, wow! I didn't know what I was expecting, but this wasn't it!

I really enjoyed it! It had the most unsuspecting plot twist I've ever seen! Quite original, indeed! I really liked it! Very much!

A few critiques:

From: "The old man frowned and waved his hand" to "Danny could only nod his head in shocked silence"

I think you could rewrite that better. It wasn't clear to what "magical" thing that occurred that gave full proof that the Old Man was not lying. So, he felt dizzy? He sat in the chair? Was it sudden? Did something else happen? wasn't quite clear and it was hard to understand what was so shocking about that scene.

Another thing is a little more description and or detail can be used in your story.

Aside from those things, however, it was wonderful! Beautiful job! I enjoyed it!
The-child-at-heart chapter 1 . 4/14/2014
A very interesting story with good twist. I liked how you had a teenage boy live out one night as a girl while being trapped in his/her own body. The conflict in himself about wanting to change back to enjoying himself and the ending where . It is a well done story and I like it, I wouldn't change anything. Jenny's bit at the end was very interesting, is there going to be a continuation for an explanation?
Azziepop chapter 1 . 4/11/2014
Well this was certainly an interesting story... It's well... how can I say this different. I certainly liked your idea but I think you need to work on how you actually present the story.
Krimson Crusader chapter 1 . 2/28/2014
Great story! My notes are in the PM
Ai-Hime chapter 1 . 2/28/2014
Wow! That was a very interesting story. Your style of writing is very good! The story ended too abruptly for me though(I need more). Anyways, keep up the good work! :D
CapsGirl4EVER chapter 1 . 2/28/2014
Wow, awesome. I just have one question... Where did you get this idea? Its so confusing, yet it drags your right in. I not an experienced wrighter but, man, you've got a wicked talent. KEEP IT UP!
ShatteredFallenAngel chapter 1 . 1/31/2014
Very odd. But very well written. So uh is Danny back to normal now or is he trapped as a girl?
DaddyLongLegs44 chapter 1 . 1/31/2014
I'm not really interested in the supernatural or romantic genre but I read a little and your writing is great. To be honest I never went to prom and kinda felt like Danny at the beginning LOL. A ton of people do read this type of genre based material though so don't let my review bring you down. Just look at Teen Wolf and Harry Potter, list goes on and on. If you ever wright a story about any action/ adventure/ suspense with guns and loads of gratuitous mindless violence, let me know :)
R. Margaret chapter 1 . 1/17/2014
Hi, I think you chose the wrong person to ask to review this story. I loathe fantasy and it isn't something I enjoy reading no matter the quality of the writing. Lol, I'm sorry. But, I can tell you that the writing of the story is superb, very visual and descriptive. I really like your style of writing and if you were to write a tragedy or horror, I would definitely read it!
Sepha chapter 1 . 1/17/2014
My jaw dislocated itself in amazement.
Leah N. Wright chapter 1 . 1/16/2014
I really enjoyed this story! I think it's well written, it's engaging, and it's the kind of story that makes you care about the characters. I think the only complaints I have are that you use 'after all' a little too much. Also try to keep from using the same descriptive words in the same paragraph, as well. I have trouble with that myself so I get how hard it can be. Something that might help is if you look up words that have similar meanings, that way you have variety while still getting your point across. The other thing I thought needs work is the ending. It doesn't make very much sense in my mind. Is the spell now lifted when he felt that last bit of magic? Did Danny really hear Jenny's voice (telepathically or otherwise), or was he remembering a conversation he had with her? Is she a part of the spell? Maybe a magic user herself if she does speak to him telepathically? Anyway it raises questions that make the reader want to know more (which is good!), and I think you have a good beginning here.
CubicSoulstorm chapter 1 . 1/5/2014
The only thing I didn't like was the ending, unless you plan to continue this story. Other than that I wouldn't change a thing this was a great read 4/5 stars from me
NightLoverxBrokenHearted chapter 1 . 1/5/2014
I love how you did the spell, it seemed to work out perfectly with this story. Please continue to write!
Purplehamsterz chapter 1 . 1/5/2014
I really liked this! :) It had a good mixture of both funny and darker moments, and I was easily able to relate to Danny. I found the twist to be very interesting: I liked how although he did get that 'dream night', it was overshadowed by his fear and confusion. Really nice!
E-A-PoeFutureAuthor chapter 1 . 12/26/2013
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