Reviews for The Revelation
MusingRaydius chapter 1 . 9/4/2012
I came in here thinking that such a topic of love would be rather cliche (as with most stories) and hard to understand, but from the first paragraph something strange manifested itself from your writing. It's quite hard to explain, but the way you write, your style is not grandiose nor is it underdeveloped but rather realistic in nature. Th eword choice is what most people would easily recognize and the tone you have exudes the bittersweet emotion I think you wanted to express.

Aesthetically speaking, your paragraphs seem to be oddly composed as if you pressed enter after each sentence. It may be intentional or not but it doesn't really affect the story al that much. As for the story, I really do like the way you put all of your thoughts into words like "that is completely normal to happen randomly, right?" and "His smile reminded me of Jon Snow from A Game Of Thrones for some reason, I don't know why" because it allows us readers to be a part of more than just what you've experienced on the outside. That being said, it can get a bit overwhelming because people may see it as just rambling rather than an important part of the story.

Overall, you do a great job of connecting your writing to readers like me and frankly, even though I've never had this experience, this story is enjoyable and entrancing.

-MusingRaydius