|Reviews for Howl|
| bonghi chapter 12 . 12/27/2013
Found a beautiful story but is it still alive?
| LiveLoveRead95 chapter 14 . 2/1/2013
Wow I really like where the story is going its so mysterious and suspenseful. Yea there are moments where harley justs gets annoying but overall its awesome. Can't wait :3
| Nate Wodening chapter 1 . 11/15/2012
You've caught my attention.
First of all, I'd like to complement you on the lack of grammatical and typographical errors. Good job.
This was a very good first chapter. The characters feel viscerally real: They're not cleaned up or idealized, but neither are they overdone caricatures. They act like real people.
I'm looking forward to see where the story goes from here. My guess is that there are going to werewolves.
My only complaint is that the narrator's internal dialogue seems a little overblown. Remember that the golden rule is "Show, don't tell."
| Tezzah chapter 12 . 10/22/2012
Interesting story, can't wait to see where it goes :) Please update soon :D
| KimHua chapter 5 . 10/5/2012
Wow, great chapter. I was really drawn into the tension of the scene, which played before my mind's eye like a movie. :-)
| KimHua chapter 4 . 10/5/2012
Excellent dialogue here. I really liked the interaction between Harley and Jackson.
| KimHua chapter 3 . 10/5/2012
Oh no! He was one of my favourite characters so far, too...
An interesting chapter, though it took me a little while to realize that it was several months in the storyline since Chapter 2. The description of Liz was, I thought, a little too much "tell" and not enough "show". Rather than tell us about her "wisdom well beyond her age" and her "bubbly personality", show us through dialogue/interaction with Harley so that we can see it for ourselves.
Still, very good, and my favourite line was the description of Jackson's "grind-your-bones-to-make-my-bread appearance." :-)
| KimHua chapter 2 . 10/4/2012
Well that was the first thing she did right...
You've successfully made me care for the main character. :-) It's going to be interesting to read how she intends to stay free of both jail and Frank.
| KimHua chapter 1 . 10/4/2012
What she needs to do is get as far away from him as possible! :-)
It's an interesting start, but I can't say I like any of the characters very much. Your narrative is very good, though, and drew me right into the story. We'll see what the next chapters bring!
| SaulWolfe1 chapter 3 . 9/25/2012
Well this is extremely frustrating. I don't have any form of constructive criticism what so ever. I found nothing wrong it. No imperfections, no problems, nothing. I loved it all. Character development is strong, some of the strongest I've read on this website so far. Your descriptive powers have not deserted either. I can imagine it all vividly, every last grim gritty detail, perfection and imperfection of your characters. I like how the third chapters flash forwards. No bull about her trying to find a place and set it all up, just straight in there but still with enough detail for said reader. This is a special story indeed. You have wonderful talent.
| Guest chapter 9 . 9/23/2012
Ok, Frank is one scary bastard. I love Harleys' character, and so far I like that Liz is so little and unassuming that making her a wolf works. I love it! Can't wait to read more!
| SaulWolfe1 chapter 1 . 9/24/2012
This is a very interesting chapter. I like how it goes straight into the story. No slow build up of the characters bit by bit then the story. It was BOOM, straight in with charcater build up along the way. Perhaps you mentioned how pissed Harley was at the beginning a few too many times. Your descriptive writing is fantastic however. Your attention to detail is very good. I could imagine every tiny thing that was going on, down side of this being sometimes there was too much description. An example being the fight that Frank and his "crew" had.
Something else that I really liked was (and I don't know if this was intentional, most probably) when Harley was waiting outside with the bikes. The noises and single swaying light that flickered. Felt like one of those old horror movies. Story starts off with a pure biker feel only to slip into creepy with a hint of possible horror. In short, I like this. I will read more when time is free. Keep up the good work.
| Author Leigh Songstad chapter 1 . 9/19/2012
Wow, great descriptions! Love this.
| julianmarq chapter 7 . 9/18/2012
why didn't Liz just shift in front of her? :
| The Autumn Queen chapter 1 . 9/18/2012
Opening: ["Eight twenty-seven, please." I stood there for a moment, ] - as the speaker and the subject of the second line are different, I think they should be on separate paragraphs. On its own like that confuses things a little, and that's particularly important in an opening because that's where you want to hook the reader, not muddle them up. :) The other thing is that your paragraph comes out a tad long and that's not aesthetically appealing at the beginning. Depending, it might work in the middle, but definitely not at the beginning.
Writing: it's good in some places - quite a bit of detail so it gives a good feel on the narrative, but in other places it's too dense. That makes it difficult to read through action. Some of your wording seems to suggest other things as well, eg. [Frank's motorcycle became my own personal getaway] - a single time event? Because it sounded from before you'd be talking more generally but the wording suggests single event. They're subtle things, but perhaps something you'd like to keep an eye on.
Dialogue: I've got no problem with the actual words. Direct and a good reflection on the scene. Your speaker tags on the other hand come out a little counter-productive sometimes. For example, ["Can we call the dogs back, please? I really don't like to see kids cry," I said] - works better if the speaker tag broke the dialogue ie. after "please" as opposed to tagged on the end there.
["Jesus, just do what I said!" the irritation ] - that should be a capital "T".
Ending: I like its directness. It's content too functions as a summary of sorts for the chapter and a leadup to the next one. [I would try to get him to listen to my voice of reason.] - perhaps don't emphasise the "my" there - makes it /too/ personal.