this is good :D keep it up

PLEASE MORE I WANT TO READ MORE NOW!

burn Betsy!

this is fun fun fun fun fun to read

This isn't as scary as the other chapters, but it was quite interesting! Keep it up!

This is, yet again, perfect. :D

Hey you remember how last time i reviewed how i said more soon? Now i'm demanding it! You need to write more or I might not live to next week! Must. Read. More!

You're writing scares me so bad! But that's what I like about it!

I really like the use of present tense - it gives the narration so much more power, since it can intermingle with the internal monologue.

I'm still not understanding why she doesn't get rid of the dolls. This is a pretty common storyline, with the dolls and all, and I don't think you can make it creepy by going about it in the same way that everybody else does. These stories rely heavily on suspension of disbelief, because why wouldn't the character leave the dolls? I'd like more development of this to make it more unique.

The eyelashes are definitely a creepy image. I'd like more. How did they look in the dolls hand? What did her face look like without lashes?

Hello hello!

I really like the narration here. The simple, disjointed sentences set the tone well, and make the prose seem more detached and jagged. You slip in just enough details to set the scene, as well.

I'd like a bit more development of the narrators feelings towards the dolls. I get that you're trying to make the contradiction, but I feel like you could set the divide in her feelings a little better - like why she carries them with her when she doesn't trust them.

[I am in the bathroom. I had a small panic attack.] I think describing mental phenomena doesn't work nearly as well when you state it. Most people have not had a panic attack, so "I had a panic attack" doesn't trigger anything in their minds.

Great start!
-Liv

This reads like a great movie script. The only thing missing for me is a bit of description about James the Therapist at the beginning. Just a bit to indicate the gender, body size, and nature of the just an fyi, at the end, he's probably massaging his wounds, not messanging them. ;)

Great dialogue throughout. I "get" the scene where this is being played out .

I think this a great start. Barely any grammatical errors, which you know I look for! Successful characterization thru the chapters you've posted so far. Keep up the mental toughness to finish this diary!

Okay, you know what? You're scaring me. Yes, I'm afraid of porcelain dolls. They have this aura of murderous feelings as if they want to tear our insides to out. So scary!
*shudders*

Nice update

Oh my gosh this is great! More soon i hope!