Reviews for Opposing Images: A Haiku Collection
Dragonstream chapter 3 . 9/15/2012
Again, nice contrast and thought-provoking. The subject matter of life/death/the universe isn't terribly fresh, though.
Anihyr Moonstar chapter 3 . 9/15/2012
I like this one too! Not quite as much as the first, but more than the second. It's a similar format to the first (one line to connect two lines of contrast) but in reverse order (the connecting line being the first as opposed to the last).

I like that it opens with the positives - painting the vast picture of the wonderous universe - before wiping out all that life and presenting the flip side. It gives it a nice sense of the natural deterioration of things into chaos. I don't like the word "empty", though, if only because it's just...wrong. The universe is not empty. There *are* massive swaths of empty space, but there are also so many countless things strung out through it (everything in our human existence important to us included) that it feels unfair to call it empty. But that's me. :P

I think you have a talent for haikus. :)

- Moonstar, Courtesy of the Review Game's Review Marathon - link in my profile
Anihyr Moonstar chapter 2 . 9/15/2012
Hn, this one is nice - I particularly like the middle line "a spectacle of color" as it reminds me of a turning kalidescope as the seasons rotate.

But I don't it on the whole as much as the previous one, mostly because it's a lot more vague. The death of what, precisely? Any random person or animal in their lifetime, is what I conclude, but it takes a bit for that to sink in. It also doesn't have quite the impact of the last one. *But*, still enjoyable, I think. :)

- Moonstar
Anihyr Moonstar chapter 1 . 9/15/2012
Wow, this is actually really neat! I like the contrast, but more than that I love how you actually manage to tie it in, first presenting the reader with two seemingly totally opposing images, and then melding them at the gravesite.

I also like that you paired off two sets of alliteration with the first and second lines "Sweet spring" and "Corpses crumble" - it adds a nice sense of flow (and connection between the two otherwise entirely seperate images.

- Moonstar, Courtesy of the Review Game's Review Marathon - link in my profile
Dragonstream chapter 2 . 9/15/2012
I can completely picture the seasons passing and flashes of color flying by, growing more and more blurry until your vision fades. Lovely poem. The placement of two dashes seems awkward; you can probably ax the second one.
Dragonstream chapter 1 . 9/15/2012
The contradictory imagery of flowers vs death is really nice. The one thing that bothers me a bit is the semi-rhyming of "decay" and "graves."
moon-behind-dark-clouds chapter 3 . 9/14/2012
what, you don't believe in life on other planets? shame on you lolol just kidding! ;) love this piece. awesome job with the word choice and the contrast the words represent.
moon-behind-dark-clouds chapter 2 . 9/14/2012
powerful composition. eerie, but very true. well done!
The Autumn Queen chapter 3 . 9/14/2012
Ooh, I think this is my favourite one from you so far.

I like the use of the word "vast" because you show it infinite but attempt to confine it at the same time. A contradiction within itself, and especially fitting in a haiku.

I also like the second and third lines because they give a really nice comparative image, the good and the bad so to speak. You've written it as though they feed into each other - contradictory but clinging to each other in a way that is difficult to pry apart. Nice.

Ohana from the review marathon (link in profile)
The Autumn Queen chapter 2 . 9/14/2012
I like your first line because it's, on the whole, undefined so it alludes to an undefined passing of time and changing in the world as well (the latter something I commonly see left out). I don't like the dash in the second line because, this time, it seems to overemphasise the second line and its relation to the third. I don't think you need anything there to be honest.
The Autumn Queen chapter 1 . 9/14/2012
I like the comparison of smell here, because while I've seen lots of contrasting images in haiku, I've never seen one based on smell, much less utilising sound-techniques like alliteration to further enforce that. Nicely written.

The one thing I can critique about this haiku is your use of commas because the first one seems to underrepresent the contrast between the two lines and the second just seems unnecessary.

Ohana from the review marathon (link in profile)