Reviews for One
LittleC chapter 1 . 11/24/2012
very simple yet effective :)
Oak Leaf Ninja chapter 1 . 11/22/2012
You will breathe... Trust me.
Brianarae0408 chapter 1 . 11/16/2012
Woah! This is one powerful poem.
midnight1899 chapter 1 . 11/5/2012
LOVE this! especially the stanza
Wishing hoping for the truth,/But dying in all my youth,

check out my story and the world spins madly on. different concept but it reminded me of it.
Lyra Kaji chapter 1 . 11/4/2012
This is about adolescent confusion and guilt, I think...It's very sincere and heartfelt, and something I think everyone can relate to. This poem is tragically sweet.
Starry-eyed Starfish chapter 1 . 10/30/2012
I find that I always like rhyming poems, just because my simple brain finds them easier (( not to say your other non-rhymey poems are bad - we both know they are brilliant ;) ))
This one started really sweet at first and, it seemed to me, grew - not exactly darker... but... - more... I can't think of the word... Honest maybe? Through the piece - as if it was revealing its true intentions :3
I'm not sure if this was intentional, or if you just numbered the poem, but the title almost made it seem like the character felt at one with this person yet that "one" was now breaking apart and they don't know what to do... My take on it, probably not right though :P
As usual: Keep it uppppp
sapphireshadow15 chapter 1 . 10/15/2012
I love this poem. It's so simple and quaint.
The last line could use a little more flow, to give the poem a great finale. It's perfectly fine as it is though! It just seems..out of flow for some reason...?
walls-have-ears chapter 1 . 9/26/2012
Great rhyming used in this, I like it!
tolerate chapter 1 . 9/14/2012
I absolutely love the rhyming. The poem's good.