|Reviews for High Shores: Battle Festival|
| Kouki chapter 9 . 8/26/2014
Awesome Awesome Awesome Awesome Awesome Awesome Awesome!
I really don't think I can say anything more than that, this setting you've created is incredibly original and the characters are really easy to get into; the story flows nicely and I can honestly say that the anticipation for what's gonna happen next is killing me (figuratively).
My only concern is the fight scenes, they flow well and they're incredibly;y creative but I feel as though there are certain parts where you're giving too much information and it slows the fight down a little. Another is grammar, especially in the longer chapters; you tend to forget words or double words and sometimes punctuation (I know I shouldn't be talking, but I have to be thorough)
All in all, the story so far has an amazing balance of action, suspense and overall character development. So, good job!
| Darth Zannacross chapter 8 . 4/13/2014
Well, tension between family and tension between friends, what is worst? I guess Dante is about to find out.
Lance seems a lot more chill then I thought for the S Rank, but then , the strong ones always seem to be easy going. Haha, its just like Stark from Bleach.
We will see if the advice will help now that this James captured Soyna. Also there is Amantia being trained by the witches, wonder where that will add up. On top of that things are even more tense with Ceberus and his family, we will see where that goes as well.
Things are shaping up to be rather intense, though it does seem like you don't intend to continue from here. A pity since I was quite curious to see how this all plays out. Oh well, been intense so far, hope to see more and till next time thanks for another great chapter.
| DevilPogoStick chapter 8 . 4/13/2014
Damn, and things get whoa XD
Now that the final stages have begun, I expect big things to happen...Loads of big things.
...Highwind Siblings are cute...In their own weird way XD
And whoa, what's with James Prowl?! ...James Prowl! QAQ
Keep it up!
| cmaej chapter 4 . 4/13/2014
Now, I get it.
Cervantes's family doesn't shun him for being weak, but choosing to be weak. I guess that makes them a little less unbearable. But for the love of gawd, why you waited for Amanita to get beaten up? I guess if he had jumped in, it would be a dishonor of some sort.
I'm also disappointed that Dante recovered some of his Fighter's Spirit after only a single training session with the Reaping Shadows. I was almost killed by the snakekin, but the Fighter's Spirit left him hanging then. It's implying that this whole time he didn't even try.
Sorry for ranting. I'm big on characters. *w*
| kingofe3 chapter 3 . 4/13/2014
Um, wow, Cervantes just suddenly turned into an ass. Is what his siblings really said affected him to turn all the sudden?
And Dante, is about time for him to grow some balls. Awaken that hidden power you know all shonen heroes have inside! /shot
I don't exactly find Amanita or Sonya interesting tbh. At least not as of yet.
| kingofe3 chapter 2 . 4/13/2014
I find some words to be a bit contradictory with Cornell and Capulet. Guess we should expect a fight scene between them and Cervantes soon.
I wonder of Sonya's true intentions though. She's not obviously just a pretty girl who happened to walk by. Grow some hair on your chest, Dante! You have a harem now!
Hope Soren doesn't turn into a jerk. He seems pretty cool now.
| DevilPogoStick chapter 7 . 4/13/2014
...What the Hell is going no here? ...LOL XD
Okay okay, enough of that, this chapter is an emotional punch to the stones. All secrets are out and Dante is taking all of this the good ole Anakin Skywalker way...That is bitch about how everyone around him is a liar and not consider their point of views. While Sonya's group barring Dillon are harsh, it's been made clear they have a rough life and that they'll do anything to get out of such a thing. Again, Dante's friends made it a bad moment to tell what they knew but frankly, they have the guts to straight up tell him their secrets to him.
In the end, the Highwind siblings pretty much gave Dante a major wake up call that his piss poor attitude and "it's all about me" mentality makes his angst his own damn fault and he just simply never found this out until two of the most unlikely people made it clear to him.
...Frankly, he better be like Darth Vader because he's heading to that point that made Anakin a dumbass. XD
Keep it up!
| kingofe3 chapter 1 . 4/13/2014
Interesting first chapter with lots of material covered. Not exactly fond of any characters yet, but this is only the first chapter and all. Lots of telling and spelling errors throughout, but it was evident since this was for NaNo. Very nice work, Vio.
| ArowaRimu chapter 1 . 4/13/2014
A little late for a review, but I'll squeeze it in nonetheless. It doesn't even have to be because of Story Club! I started reading expecting a modern day story about brawls and competitions about fighting, but it seems I was off the mark by a rather wide tangent! Not to say it's anything bad, it was just surprising to read about a setting in the future with magic and fantastical races and whatnot. Definitely interesting from the get-go.
Though it seemed to drag on a bit, the introduction recounting the past of Dante and Soren was an interesting read. At points it seemed as though you were rushing though, skimming over details to get right into the tragic accident. The interaction in the beginning was definitely less focused than the present day portions, though I can understand how you might have wanted to sum up an otherwise lengthy recount.
I would have given a suggestion to do it another way, but the amnesia presents itself as a problem detriment to using Dante's memory to tell what happened.
Still, I liked the interaction between the Seberul family, though Soren seemed a bit too harsh on Dante in some parts. He also never showed much affection for his brother in the short segments where they talked or played with each other. He seemed cold, yes that's the word.
In present day everything just seemed so much more fantastical, lol. Maybe that was the point? Still, Amanita seems to be a cool girl, maybe a bit tomboyish but they are students of a battle school so it isn't much of a problem. Cervantes seemed the weakest in terms of character in this opening chapter though that might just be because of him not talking much. I liked how he seemed to have a chip for the principal, being the one weakest out of his family. I wonder where that sub-plot is gonna unfold?
The fights were definitely the meat of this chapter, so thick with description I had to slow down just to draw out the scene in my head. As a suggestion, perhaps those parts could be split into paragraphs? A new paragraph every time a new move is made or something, or when the momentum shifts to whomever is having the upper-hand. The chunks of words just made it slightly more difficult to take in is all.
And the ending was so far out there I didn't know how to react! I'm definitely intrigued though! Not just to see who's fighting who and who get's the wish in the end, but also how you're writing and weaving the concept of wishes into your established world(They seem too overpowered, reality-bending and all that good stuff)
If genies does wish-granting on a regular basis, doesn't this mean the world's that much more chaotic? Is this wish-granting the reason why the world only has a single continent right now?
So many questions, guess I'll just have to read on to find out!
| DevilPogoStick chapter 6 . 4/13/2014
...This is a massive bombshell of epic proportions. O_O
I never expect Dante to kill someone. While they do want to kill him and Dillon, it was just...Whoa.
Then the whole werewolf deal and now the fact Soren was...A very bitter brother back in the day and was much like current Dante by the start of the story (highly resentful because the other was better) though Soren had taken a much more nastier route. On one hand, there was some regret, as Soren somewhat made it clear he never wanted to resort to this but other than the fighter soul (which alone is already a reason to hinder Dante before reaching his potential) it was mainly fueled by resentment.
And now, things are just getting more and more intense. The Highwind Siblings are now on the move.
Keep it up!
| DevilPogoStick chapter 5 . 4/13/2014
Kind of great to see the on-growing relationship with Dante and Dillon.
Also, damn Cervantes...Way to drop that bombshell, eh? XD
And yes, beat the fucking Hell out of that asshole Dante! XD
But damn...This doesn't look good with the Ravages now in the fray. QAQ
Keep it up!
| DevilPogoStick chapter 4 . 4/12/2014
...Jesus, Cervantes is a monster...I mean B-Rank but again, ranks are for strict jackasses who assume too much can be seen by such ranks.
And well...looks like Dante better not get any of that damn angst because he's actually learning here! XD
Finally...Can we really trust Sonya? I mean yes, we know her past is more sympathetic but while the others are...Harsher, they seem to know something more that Dante is unaware of.
Keep it up!
| DevilPogoStick chapter 3 . 4/12/2014
Oh my god, yes.
Dante needed that verbal bitch slap to get out of that angst. This is exactly like Anakin as he turns into Darth Vader. I know I'm using a villain but the way it's done are bringing my inner Star Wars! XD
Sonya and Cervantes made it clear to Dante he's truly being a coward to himself and he now realizes this,
...Really, more of these and Dante will truly improve.
And now, morality kicks in as Cervantes...Again brings a good point over the whole thing about if such actions are worth the trouble. He may have been a dick to Dante in this chapter but he damn well had to see if Dante was truly determined or just running away from his troubles while blaming the loss of his talents as the reason why his life sucks.
Keep it up!
| DevilPogoStick chapter 2 . 4/12/2014
Dante...Yeah, I feel for him.
I still think he was harsh to Soren but he suffered a lot more with the memory loss. But the fact he accused Soren of having everything made things sting for me because my brother once accused me of this...I mean yes, he apologize and realize I wasn't like that but ouch.
And Sonya is right, Dante really needs to understand rank means nothing. If you respect someone regardless of rank, you're a Hell better person.
And somehow I sorta agree with Cervantes's siblings. It's tough love and they do believe he is more than what he seems. While they are harsh over his choice of friends, they do have confidence that he'll become stronger. While they believe Dante to be one to give up so easily...In a way, they have a point. Dante is too wrapped up on his rank and his past talents that it's hindering his current progress. I mean...Still, they are pretty damn high and uppity about it.
As for the Dante hindering himself talk, compare him to Darth Vader of Star Wars. As Anakin Skywalker, he was an extremely talented warrior. Once he was crippled and became Darth Vader, he wasn't able to be the once powerful warrior he was thanks to talent he now lost. It took him a while to basically close the door on his past life and consider his it something he just can't go back to. As he accepts the changes of his life, he quickly regained his skills to that of his old life, but was stronger due to his hard work of completely retooling his style that has more than talent backing him up. Basically, the more he stops looking into the past in an attempt to regain what he has lost, the stronger Darth Vader is.
Like Vader, Dante as of now has to move on with his life and stop trying to reach for a past he can't go back to if he wants to be a great fighter.
...Course, that's kind of harsh given that this is a guy who has no memories rather than simply being crippled lol
Keep it up!
| DevilPogoStick chapter 1 . 4/12/2014
First off...So sorry of not getting to this sooner.
It's been a hectic week. :(
Nevertheless, let's see what we got here. :)
I got to say, like most of your works, the premise leaves a great lasting impression. I like how itexplains the setting, the characters, and what we may see in future chapters.
Dante is a intriguing case since the fact is that he has suffered memory loss. Though Soren is thankfully spared from this...Mostly. But jesus, having the parents die such a way? You are hardcore. XD
Details are fun as always...It makes me wish I have such descriptive powers LOL
The concept of Battle Festival itself is also an interesting take. Reminds me of most works that involves a big world like event. I mean...Not like Hunger Games at least because that is dark as Hell XD
Keep it up!