|Reviews for Muscle For Hire|
| earthday chapter 14 . 10/13/2014
Great chapter! I love how Mary is taking control of the situation and coming into her own. I'm so intrigued to see how this develops, and what she will do to take on Elizabeth! Marco and Mary have such passion and tension between them too, and I wonder if Mary's connections with him will land her in trouble, as Marco suggested? I felt so sorry for Captain McCluskey too - Mary dealt with him so sympathetically. Ooh, and I loved the title of this chapter too - Me and You! So lovely :)
| Hedonistic Opportunist chapter 1 . 10/12/2014
The name 'O Hara' is a sweet nod to 'Gone with the Wind': I'd be careful about using it though, due to various copyright shenanigans. However, still I like that name, because it definitely reminded me of Scarlet, and she was a character I loved a lot once. Anyhow, what I really like is your writing style: it's quite concise and minimalistic, but it's not bare, and you give us just the right amount of details to let the story unfold before our eyes. Moreover, what I especially is your strong focus on dialogue; it lets the story develop at a more natural pace and also allow for lots of banter between the two mains. What especially helps (and which I love) is how the dialogue flows wonderfully, and how you've injected both of your main characters with sarcasm and wit.
I cannot deny that I am intrigued by the plot: it seems to be heading towards an interesting direction, what with the woman ordering the man to kill someone for her. It further intrigues me (and I love this too) is how both main characters are smart and seem to know what they want; it makes them a dangerous combination, and I cannot wait to see how their chemistry will unfold :)
This was review was brought to you by the Review Game Forum's October Review Marathon!
| earthday chapter 13 . 7/3/2014
I thought Mary's passion and ferocity in this chapter was interesting! She's a fab character, full of lots of different emotions and personality. The chemistry she has with Marco was evident in this chapter as well, especially in the part where he got her to say who the boss was between her and Elizabeth! There's a lot of tension between them. I wonder how the dinner will go!
| earthday chapter 12 . 5/18/2014
Wow, what a naughty, delicious chapter! I expect Marco has something devious planned for Mary though! They have such an interesting dynamic between them that you are so good at exploring and suggesting at! I wonder where this will all go next! :)
| earthday chapter 11 . 4/13/2014
Ooh, I love the differences in Marco's relationships with the two women - very interesting! They're all such great characters and an intriguing Alternative Universe premise. I especially liked the cheekiness of the last lines! And Elizabeth seems very in control of her actions and others! Nice little update :)
| earthday chapter 10 . 1/19/2014
This was a great chapter! I adored the tension between Marco and Mary and seeing it from Marco's perspective. The last line was fabulous - I loved how well it summed up the entire chapter. You've created a really interesting relationship for them :)
| earthday chapter 9 . 12/14/2013
Oh, I'm sure I read this! I must have not left a review! Silly me! Anyway, this was great - I thought it was really effective how Marco called Elizabeth 'red' - it was quite demeaning in a way and showed somewhat of his feelings towards her. The tension between them in this chapter was great. Can't wait to see how that develops! And how that affects Mary as well! :)
| Carmel March chapter 9 . 12/14/2013
Great chapter, I'm really enjoying this!
| Carmel March chapter 8 . 11/10/2013
This is SO GOOD. I wish the chapters were longer, but other than that, this is off to a wonderful start :) Keep up the good work!
| earthday chapter 8 . 11/7/2013
I love the sentences you end chapters with! They wrap up the chapter so well and make the reader want to carry on reading more, like good cliffhangers all the way through! I just loved the interactions between Elizabeth and Mary in this chapter - they're so different and clash in really interesting ways! And I'd love to see where Marco comes in with all of this and if Elizabeth is right in her suspicions or not! The relationships and dynamics in your stories are always great to read :)
| earthday chapter 7 . 8/25/2013
Wow, you're right, that was steamy! Maybe one of the steamiest chapters I've read of yours! Marco and Mary's interactions were interesting in this chapter (though I couldn't help feeling a little sorry for her - I wonder what she has got herself into?) and I can't wait to see if Elizabeth finds out and what her reaction might be if she did!
| mcc1089 chapter 6 . 8/14/2013
A very interesting story. I can't wait for more! I'm putting this on my alerts!
| mcc1089 chapter 1 . 8/14/2013
I really like this pilot chapter. It was interesting and slightly mysterious. Sentence structure is great and I like the imagery you portray. I'm excited to read the next chapter.
| earthday chapter 6 . 8/9/2013
Ooh, great new chapter! I loved the title of it - it was like it had a double meaning - Mary under the influence of the alcohol she was drinking but also under the influence of liking Marco and therefore, talking so highly about him! Plus, I loved the contrast of her in the rougher part of the city and the cliffhanger ending was brilliant!
| Just Entity chapter 5 . 6/13/2013
Good, update soon!