Hellfire is one of those stories where you don't have a clue until the end...and then it all makes sense. I was just about ready to give up on trying to understand it all...but I encourage you to keep reading! It's worth it!

This is a hilarious plot, great job :). I especially liked the dialogue and description pacing, they were both well balanced, and so weren't super boring to read :)
Awesome work,
Truth :)

Beautiful writing.

I love the pacing in the beginning. You capture the chaos of the scene well - there's sort of a jumpy feeling, like everything is going on at once, and I think you handle it well. The voice is authentic. Great narration in general - especially at the beginning.

I'm having trouble placing the gender of the main character. The voice is very masculine, but he/she talks about relationships with males. It'd still work, I think, but I'd like to see a detail somewhere to push the scales either way.

I'm not sure what I think about the word "blam-blam." It seems childish, but people make stupid names up all the time. I don't want to tell you to change it, since as far as made-up slang goes it isn't horrible, but it does jump out at me as kind of odd.

The characters are very strong - all of them, and I can still picture the ones who don't appear on-screen. Great job.

I like how you introduce a character who has a very fragile psyche and is easily hallucinating because it shows the way his life was when he was younger and how twisted he was. I also liked how Satan is characterizied because he sounds almost human to the reader. I can't wait to read more of this story.