Reviews for Creation of Lust
LunaForgotten chapter 2 . 12/22/2013
Id love it if there was more.
Guest chapter 1 . 6/21/2013
"Why hello there! It's me! A dude that wants to write...

What's below this note is a story, based on my imagination, a Sin, and a Roman Emperor, the most disgusting of them all, and probably the most disgusting man on earth...It's a short oneshot about how the seed of Lust was inserted inside said emperor's mind...it's sort of open ended, so...

I also warn any who reads this, this content may or may not be suited for minors...it's the sin of Lust after all...so! be Warned, it's described and mentioned very well and on multiple ocasions...!

On with the story" - LOSE THIS!

"It took of the hood, revealing waves of mid-length brown hair, the fairness of his features, and the beauty of his young and godly appearance. "I am Mors, mortal, god of death" he said, his voice like that of a simple teenager." - There is no 'Mors' in Roman or Greek myth. If you advertise your story as Mythology, sick to the actual Gods and don't make up your own.

"You, Sextus Varius Avitus Bassianus, Ceasar of the Roman Empire..." You said th Emperor was Augustus. These were not part of his name. In fact, you first introduce him by a fictional name. In point of fact, his full name as Emperor was Caesar Marcus Aurelius Antoninus Augustus.

"You are a fine young, roughly 18 of age, and yet you are the emperor of the strongest empire we've ever seen. Your speciality is precisely what defines that fact." No. By the time he was Emperor Augustus was a 'young' 36 years old.

"Not only are you a Sin, but you are one of the Seven Deadly" - A Christian construct.

Stop writing until you flesh out the details of the this one.
Erica chapter 1 . 4/24/2013
It was short, sweet and enjoyable. I liked it, but sometimes you snapped out of charachter, going from ye old medival times to things like "You're kidding me, right?" Someone back then would be more like "Do not treat me as I fool" or something along those lines.

But all in all, not half bad.