Reviews for The Escape
Megan chapter 1 . 2/27/2013
Good story so far.
I liked the dynamics between characters. You made the exchange between the Taker and you're main character very emotional. It was so heart wrenching. Another thing I liked was how you set the stage for future chapters. In just the first of many to come, you introduced the goal of the characters, a major conflict that plays into the story and a mystery thatll keep readers hooked, as I am. For your first story this is an amazing start.
As for constructive criticism, there are two problems Ive noticed: some grammatical errors and a somewhat copy flow. I noticed some grammar errors here and there. Don't worry, its a common mistake every one makes. My advice Is to get a Beta reader to help you, I hearthey do wonders. As I mentioned earlier, your story was a bit choppy. Try to smoothen the flow a bit and add more dialouge to the scene.
Hopefully none of what Ive said has offended you in any way. Its a great start to a great story, I can't wait for more!
Ps: sorry, this site won't let me use my fan fiction account.