|Reviews for Something Like Austen|
| YoungSongtress chapter 2 . 7/21/2013
Genny was a stick in the mud and now she's all open and lively. Nice way to flesh out a character and make her believeable
| rougette chapter 1 . 7/5/2013
This seems interesting so far! I'm not sure if I should presume that this is based off an Austen novel, as suggested by the title, or just inspired by it. Either way, you have a really good way with words and caught me from the first chapter. I would have liked more of a hook at the end of it, but it was really lovely all the same!
| YoungSongtress chapter 1 . 7/3/2013
You have a very unique style of writing and I would appreciate for you to read one of my stories and give me review.
| Lynn K. Hollander chapter 7 . 5/11/2013
'Said' is neutral. It is such a neutral way of describing the act of speaking that it is pretty much ignorable.
'Commented', 'questioned', 'stated', and 'mentioned' have specific connotations -baggage- that modify the act of speaking; and they all stick out like sore thumbs.
'Assured' and 'defended' are NOT, by themselves, synonyms for said, and are really jarring when used in place of a clear and simple 'said'.
I know interior monologues are allowed much more latitude than prose, but this bit 1) makes no sense, and 2) contains a run-on sentence, with a typo: "They will only be here for another week. Until their departure, I shall make enemies with them. Augustus, Simon, Rebecca, and Henry will be my militia it is time to prepare or war."
Until their departure, I shall make enemies with them. -'make enemies'. How? and for that matter, Why? Shouldn't she just treat them with polite restraint and not trust them? ...I shall treat them as enemies and not trust them... One can be perfectly civil and still be enemies.
Augustus, Simon, Rebecca, and Henry will be my militia(AND HERE, you need some punctuation: a colon would work; so would a semi-colon. Possibly the best would be the simplest: a period and a new sentence)_._ It is time to prepare _for_ war."
| leavesfallingup chapter 7 . 5/11/2013
The jump into animosity in this chapter seems extreme. I had to go back to see if I had somehow missed a chapter in-between, but that didn't turn out to be the case. Honestly, it was a little confusing.
| leavesfallingup chapter 6 . 5/7/2013
What is the actual time frame for this story?
| leavesfallingup chapter 2 . 5/7/2013
So then, Genny is the "long lost sibling" of Mr. Jarvis? I wonder why her true last name was changed.
Also, if the the Youinous adopted the girls, why didn't they teach them dance, courtly manners, etc.?
| leavesfallingup chapter 1 . 5/7/2013
This seems like it will be a fun story to read. Two of the sisters are already interesting. I'm sure that you'll develop the others as the chapters continue. Will Rebekah also have a romance or is she relegated to the status of invisible servant?
| Violetta27 chapter 1 . 4/21/2013
Sorry! I meant to say...As always, a lovely chapter! Keep writing! :)
| Violetta27 chapter 6 . 4/21/2013
As always, a lovely
| musicallyme chapter 4 . 3/28/2013
this story is really good and well written. i hope you update soon abecause im very excited about how tgis story will turn out :D
| Lynn K. Hollander chapter 4 . 3/27/2013
Still dialogue tag problems: "I'm terribly sorry, sir." Mr. Jarvis stated & "You must be Fredrick's supposed twin," He mentioned. More correctly: "I'm terribly sorry, sir(COMMA)," Mr. Jarvis stated & "You must be Fredrick's supposed twin," (NO CAPITAL LETTER HERE) he mentioned.
| Violetta27 chapter 2 . 3/9/2013
Cute story, I hope you'll finish it! Post the next chapter soon! :)
| Lynn K. Hollander chapter 1 . 3/7/2013
"If you'll pardon me, miss, but you seem to be out of sorts today. I couldn't help but notice." Rebecca stated & "Oh no, I'm fine. I was just thinking." Genevieve replied. -and other dialogue tag sentences: Wrongly punctuated. This one: "Dear, would you like to tell them the big news?" He asked -is incorrectly capitalized; and this one: "Now, Genny, ... some young men for a change." He replied defensively -is both. And this seems to be a problem of proofreading/editing since other examples are correct: "You have such a sour attitude about these things, Genny," Victoria replied & "I actually think it will be nice to get out of the house and into society for once," Minerva commented -are correctly capitalized and punctuated, so you actually know how they all should go. More attentive proofreading is necessary.
Ms: Yes, it's been around since the 1600s, but Austen uses Miss for unmarried girls. Ms usage fluctuated, with frequent instances alternating with times of little or no usage. The 19th Century, 1801-1900, was a time of little Ms use.
',,,but she felt very strongly about scholastics': Awkward word choice. 'Scholastics' is defined as referring to schools or academics. 'Scholarship' means 'the methods and attainments of a scholar' which makes more sense in this context.