Reviews for Wooing
Anihyr Moonstar chapter 1 . 3/31/2013
I think the rhythm of this improved as it went along. At first it felt a little bumpy and hard to get into, but about halfway through, it really started to roll off the (mental) tongue as I read it and felt quite lovely. The plethora of commas made it feel almost like riding a wave.

The tone felt refreshingly gritty for 'love' poetry, though I think you do that quite a bit with your poems. Not gritty in an unappealing way, but it just had a lot more...bite to it. There's a dangerous sort of appeal there painting a picture of the kind of pleasure that flirts with (and may well end in) pain.

As a whole, I think most all of the imagery in this works really well to enforce that tone as well as just bring the poem to life. These lines in particular heighten the sense of beauty mixed with pain and/or excitement mixed with danger - [an animal skittering toward the busy road] [lush like frostbitten lips] And the sequence quoted in your summary felt like an incoming swell washing onto the beach (the way the words just keep rolling in, spilling detail).

Really enjoyed this piece. Easily my favorite line in the whole thing: [I will catch / your breath between my teeth and hold it there] Just a great play on words/mental image that I get there.

- Moonstar