|Reviews for Heroine's Best Friend|
| KoriNeko18 chapter 3 . 9/14/2013
Not sure why I haven't left a review.
Anyway, I like this story, and the characters are sweet! the premise is interesting, since side characters rarely get enough time, but I feel like it's not fully in Mami's point of view, which somewhat ruins the effect.
There were some typos, but they can easily be fixed with a reread.
Something that was kind of weird was the flashback bit. While it's a very manga-esque type style, it doesn't work too well in a novel, in my opinion.
Or perhaps just the big bold letters were very out of place. I'm sure italics could get the point across well enough, with a small divider, perhaps.
Anyway, I like the story, and where it's going, as well as Mami, Aki, and Emiko's relationship. Also, Mami's ex sounds interesting, and I hope he becomes more incorporated in the story sometime!
Keep up the writing, and I'm looking forward to the next chapter!
| E.T.Novem chapter 3 . 8/24/2013
I agree about the last part in your glossary! An overused cliche plot setting, but it always seems to does the trick with the proper characters!
Finally reached the latest chapter! Really loving how the characters have interacted and what's this?! Mami seems to be interested in Kakeru...? I foresee a love triangle bound to happen! Please continue your work soon, I'm really starting to love your work. I've checked your profile as well...wow, I'm really impressed and admire the relationship with your best friend, to be able to illustrate and write while your friend helps to translate your work.
All I can say now is keep it up! Until the next update!
| E.T.Novem chapter 2 . 8/24/2013
Having read the second chapter, I'm really starting to get immersed into your story! I wonder what's Mami's true character? Could she maybe have a fractured heart in the realm of love? She seems to pessimistic when it comes to relationship, I wonder why...
As for the buildup, it's really smooth and well-paced. I dislike rushed relationships so I kinda enjoyed this! For a moment, I thought that Kakeru was going after Mami...but I'm glad he didn't (yet, hopefully not).
| E.T.Novem chapter 1 . 8/24/2013
I have to wonder why didn't I saw this story earlier! It's really interesting and fun to read, a genre and writing style I'm comfortable with! Not many writers I've seen are able to write like this.
Though I have to say, it isn't perfect. You have typo errors here and there, albeit minor. It's either you've missed a letter and given it an extra letter, changing the context. I would go through them with you, but I'm using my phone to read so it's rather hard to navigate...
Anyways! I love the characters! Not only that, I'm very, very impressed with your drawings! I bought a wacom at home but luck has it that my laptop broke down...so I'm leaving the drawing tablet to collect dust. How I wish I could draw the same way as you! Do you accept requests? *laughs*
All in all, a nice introductory chapter, establishing all the characters well. I'll follow this story and see where all this is headed to!
| TheBloodEdge chapter 1 . 5/12/2013
I jumped right in the moment I read the description. Side characters need more love, especially the pervert bro characters who's only there to make the main harem protagonist look good. But enough talk, have at you. Wait, is that a Star Driver reference I see there? Well played, my good ma'am.
Okay, I understand that this is a Brazillian (Would the original language be Spanish or something that way?) and that this is translated by your friend, Barbara, so I can't tell who needs to make improvements here. The first thing you need is descriptions. Sure, you have a picture for reference but my laptop's so stupid it can't even open the link! Also, describe the setting a little. I was lost in the first section since you didn't specify where they were. Next up, the dialogue is a bit clunky, probably the translation problems. Yes, it's hard to make dialogues from a translation seem natural, but I think it should be handled a bit better.
Prose aside, let's talk about our characters. Mami's not exactly the best friend I'd rather be watching honestly. I like Aki better since she's more entertaining (Recharging... 72%). Mami's a little broody and that kinda detracts for me. Maybe I'd like her more if she was snarking at the whole situation? Afterwards, we have Emiko and Kakeru who are... Best described as your typical shoujo protagonists. I like that Emiko's traits aren't exaggerated and that she's yet to show some clumsiness and how Kakeru isn't the HOTTEST BOY EVAR but is just so-so. I wouldn't mind if it was about them actually.
Still, this story sees to be about Emiko and Kakeru, except viewed from Mami's perspective. I don't know how well it'll be executed from here on out, but I expect a lot from this story so keep it up! Both of you!
| Beccyluo chapter 2 . 5/11/2013
Hehe good job, very creative plot XD
| Guest chapter 1 . 4/9/2013
I really think that Emiko is a mary sue... But! I really, really like Mami. If i was in the same situation as her, well I would probably do the same thing... probably...