Author’s way of storytelling is so good. I suggest you publish your book in NovelStar, a lot of readers will love your work.

The thinly veiled names are a little irritating, but I'm sure I'm the only one who cares about that.

I think that you really capture the feeling of an oppressive society quite well. It's dark, and you set it up in so little time-it's great that we can get the feel of the world so quickly. Actually, what's funny is it reminds me of a school I used to go to:P

What I don't like is how little actually happens. I mean, you introduce this world and a few characters and then it just...shorts out. We're not left feeling anything, and nothing really happens, so I guess I got a little bored.

But seriously. Zed. That is just a new low for disguising names.