|Reviews for The Call of the Moon- Part 1|
| Caine chapter 1 . 12/7/2013
| Dustin Snow chapter 2 . 10/21/2013
I've read this before, actually- I like it. It is really intriguing
| Silver Witherwings chapter 24 . 10/16/2013
What a great, dynamic chapter. I liked all of the action.
| Silver Witherwings chapter 17 . 10/6/2013
Well, well, well. The witch is bold! I'm fond of her.
| Silver Witherwings chapter 16 . 10/6/2013
I wish I knew more about Paige and Malik. What do they do for a living? Do they have hobbies? I also feel like the love and devotion she feels for him is a bit rushed.
| Silver Witherwings chapter 9 . 10/6/2013
You have a habit of forgetting commas when people speak. Instead of, "You see Paige?" - it should be, "You see, Paige?" Commas are super important when it comes to proper flow.
And here - "the epiphany of nerd" - should be "epitome."
Her friend being a witch is a nice twist.
| Silver Witherwings chapter 7 . 10/6/2013
Her eyes have switched from green to blue,
I like the fact that her dad is a hunter. This is a nice set up for future conflict.
| Silver Witherwings chapter 3 . 10/6/2013
I liked the introduction of his father. The dynamic between them is intriguing.
One slight issue though: "thundering footsteps" don't "trudge." Otherwise, I like your descriptions very much.
| Silver Witherwings chapter 1 . 10/6/2013
Interesting. I wonder why he didn't stop her while he had the chance...
| zombiefodder chapter 7 . 10/4/2013
I thought her eyes were green? Good story though!
| MsTaylor chapter 19 . 9/29/2013
Yes! Update! Love the fact she is standing up for her love!
| amy.wheeler.14 chapter 15 . 9/20/2013
Whaaaaat plz add more pretty plz :-) this is awsome
| hannahisbananaz chapter 5 . 9/17/2013
Hey, you definitely deserve some more reviews, seeing as your story here so far is fantastic!
I really like the style of prose it's written in, and I haven't spotted any grammar or spelling mistakes so far. I like the story line and how you've kept the nature of the stone a mystery to us so far. Keep up the good work! :)
| VelvetyCheerio chapter 2 . 6/23/2013
You do a really good job with character relationships, and I enjoyed seeing Austen and Paige interact. They remind me of siblings. I liked how protective Austen seemed when Paige called for him.
The jewel is really interesting. Paige's reasoning kind of reminds me of those black birds that just pick up shiny things and hoard them. I think it would be pretty cool if Paige had like, an addiction to picking up random objects. Like, maybe her room would be filled with all sort of knick-knacks she found on the street or in thrift shops.
I think the ending of this chapter creates suspense on how Malik will succeed in getting the stone back. The plot promises to pick up, so that's exciting. Good luck and keep on writing! The story has a lot of potential. :)
| VelvetyCheerio chapter 1 . 6/23/2013
Hi, just your friendly neighborhood reviewer here. :D
I really liked the description of the setting in those first few sentences, dealing with the leaves and the hooded man.
[Golden hues scanned the water edge and locked on the white shivering figure of a woman as it emerged from the depths.] *eyes
I like that the supernatural elements are really prevalent already. I admit, I thought this chapter was going to go in a different direction completely, haha. I thought the woman and Malik were working together and that was why he was there watching her. I wonder how she knew to go there, or why she went there. A lot of intrigue and mystery surrounds her reasons and I think there's a lot you could get from them.
I think you could have created even more tension by keeping out that the werewolves are at war with the vampires. I think if the reader just gets this idea that the stone is important, but they don't know why it would up the anticipation of what would happen next.
I liked the dialogue between Nicholai and Malik. The subservience Nicholai expressed when he realized he had over stepped his boundaries was well done. The two seem very wolf-like in their behaviour and I think that's cool. Overall, nice prologue.