|Reviews for Heaven High more like Hell High|
| Guest chapter 9 . 2/13
GRAMMAR NEEDS TO BE DONE!
| guest14 chapter 7 . 1/16
Bryson is a dick
| EternalWolfX99 chapter 1 . 12/31/2013
I am really enjoying the story
| mjinx chapter 1 . 9/12/2013
You have good material here. But you need to be very careful with punctuation, especially periods and commas. And capitalization as well.
The boy arrived a yacht model Strand craft 122.(I)t looked as if it was from the future.(T)he boy had a tan(,) his hair was silver (and) it stopped at the base of his neck but was tied in a short ponytail. His attire was a red short sleeved shirt, with (a) black hoodie tied around his waist, black jeans, and black combat boots. The guard at the entrance of the boat asked him for his letter.(A)fter scanning it he let him on. "Excuse me(,) um where do I put my bag(?)"
"(G)ive it to me.(")
You may also want to put the next conversation on another stanza, like the one above. It makes it easier to know who's speaking what.
It just needed a little polishing. Maybe a beta reader can help you in this. But you'll get used to it with practice, so try and write as much as you can.
Well, that's all from me. Hope this helps. xD
| Corey the Hedgehog chapter 1 . 8/7/2013
wow im amazed this is great!
| TheFlyingRedJerk chapter 1 . 7/19/2013
This story is pretty great. The setting, the characters, and the humor is top notch. Though, there are a few grammatical errors like capitalization and such that could be taken cared of. It's a great story nonetheless.