Good, good! I really like your ideas and writing style. Keep it up! :D

:( I understand if you are feeling more inspired to finish another story but I do hope you come back to this one when you are done with the others!

That was pretty sad :( I think I need to re-read why his mother is acting like that. Also I don't think it's cliched at all. Good job!

HI! Sorry it's been a while! School and other things got crazy, but I'm still really enjoying the story your building here! It's extremely different and looks like it's going to be quite awesome! I feel really bad for Jay :( hope things turn out all right.

Cliched!(excuse me while I spit out my drink) Never!

Heartwarming!

You could publish this.

.GOD. I love it!

Interesting. I want to read some more!

I'm still very hooked on this story! And no, it is definitely not cliché.

As usual, your use of description is both beautiful and powerful. Practically flawless! Some of my favourite descriptions you used in this chapter were:
- "The words were not directed at her, but she could feel their poison through her veins."
- "The emotions in his voice would drive even the toughest of me to tears."

Very well written, as usual. I really hope you continue with this story. The ideas you come up with are so creative and imaginative, and I'm extremely impressed by your writing. I wish I could steal your talent. haha! :)

Well done! Keep up the excellent work! I look forward to part 2 of Chapter 5.

Jaz

Reviewing again! Bit of a short chap, at least for you, but it was great :)

This is sucha good story. I love it so much! I remember when you first posted the story :) Now it's so much longer and better!

This is a great story. Keep writin!

This is great! UPDATE SOON!

I love your names. Aside from Sam, which is a bit cliche, you have great charecter names. And personalities. I love them all :)

Maybe you could try titling your chapters? Its a pain but its alot funner to read. Trust me.

Your #1 fan, Capri

OMG, that was shocking. But it was thrilling too, and I'm a big fan of action. This is totally perfect!

Please don't think I'm being unhelpful cuz I'm not giving you advice. Its just I can see that you are a much better writer than me, so I don't know how this could be any better than it alreaady is! Maybe on cloud 9 ;)

Can't waitr to finish reading!