|Reviews for The Gathering (集会)|
| SupaSaiyanGamer chapter 21 . 3/17/2015
Glad to see the flashbacks aren't over. XD while it doesn't really move the plot, some chapters are needed like th s for stuff like character development. It could've been longer if there wasn't any progression though. Overall, it was good, but could've been better.
| Max Sorrell chapter 21 . 3/15/2015
Philip and Crispen best friendemies
| Max Sorrell chapter 20 . 3/7/2015
Hmm I can't help thinking of Crispin like Inuyasha now since he's half human half magick. XD
Very dark chapter. I loved the action. Just wish we saw more of Crispin in this chapter. As soon as he gets away I'd like to see how he copes with the loss of his parents.
| SupaSaiyanGamer chapter 20 . 3/5/2015
Well...that was dark. Way to get back into writing XD great chapter though.
| Bastard From North chapter 19 . 1/9/2015
Now that was no surprise but great anyways :D
I really like the slight change of the mood :P
I wonder what Phillip thinks all of this :D
Great chapter :)
| Bastard From North chapter 18 . 1/9/2015
Get a taste of your own medicine, kinda situation? :P
I bet Alex got a quite surprise :D Not every time when you
are kidnapped :P
Now that is a device I want :O I could get so much
ice cream, cakes and other stuff with it :D
Great chapter! :)
| Max Sorrell chapter 19 . 1/8/2015
Ugh! How come like the one time I don't want to read a romance the chapter turns out to have romance?! XD
I know you said you were bad at romance but I actually really enjoyed it.
I also really enjoyed how you compared discrimination of Magicks to other forms of discrimination in history.. It really draws the point that this is still our world, just in the future.
| Max Sorrell chapter 18 . 1/4/2015
Hmm... Flashbacks! Yay... I guess! XD
I'm curious what you're building up to. I also enjoyed the bit with Philip and the Tinkerer at the beginning of the chapter. Great comic relief. XD I don't think we've seen enough of this side of Philip yet. XD If he was more like this in the first arc I might have voted for him. XD
| Max Sorrell chapter 17 . 1/4/2015
Mia and Vanessa are now my favorite characters. XD
| Max Sorrell chapter 16 . 1/4/2015
Okay! I voted! :D
I found it interesting how quick the setting changed with Philip making Erwin take them to his layer and how quickly Erwin was killed. His death was fast and a little chilling. Just the way I like it for a character as minor as Erwin.
Also I wasn't sure how you were going to see it since we really didn't see much of the Tinkerer at all but I enjoyed how you had him ask about joining Philip. :)
| Bastard From North chapter 17 . 12/30/2014
So now we are following twin sisters, this
seems rather interesting :P
I can sense a psychopathic maniac at the
end of the chapter, this seems even more
| Bastard From North chapter 16 . 12/30/2014
Things are taking rather interesting turn :P
Crispin, I am so glad that he came along :D But I didn't
think Phillip would leave the group :D
But I guess we'll see Casper some time
Great chapter! And Merry late Christmas :)
| DappledKarma chapter 3 . 12/23/2014
I don't wanna rehash too much of what other reviewers have already said, so I'll try to be quick about this.
Although I don't think this is that big of a problem since this is the beginning, I can't really get a feel for Philip's or Summer's personalities as they are now. Showing the two interacting - and not just with words but actions as well - affectionately instead of telling the reader that they care about each other. Much better than I can, this link explains the whole "Show, don't Tell" argument (I highly recommend it):
The part when Oleg pulls out another gun with a knife. I find it kinda strange that he'd pull out the knife too. Before that point, Philip isn't aware of it, it's hidden, which means it can be used to surprise him. He shoots the gun out of Oleg's hand and confidently thinks he has won, when BAM! the officer swiftly tackles him to the floor, restraining Philip's gun hand and having a knife in his own to Philip's throat.
Also, I agree with Oleg. It's hard to believe someone who's never shot a gun before can shoot a gun out of a person's hand, but I get the feeling that that's intentional. Fiction often does make the protagonist have exceptional talent. Not really criticism so much as it is to let you be aware of the effect it may have on some readers. And, to be fair, the distance between them seems to be almost minimal.
Summer being a Magick was interesting, and I really liked how Philip reacted to it. I also like the theme of discrimination against Magicks. And the word Magick itself is a cool word, hehe.
| Sentimental RainCloud chapter 2 . 12/23/2014
Hi, there, just hope you're open to light CC.
I must say I like the premise a lot, the prologue was good, though it was more explanation and telling than showing what had happened and why.
Okay, to be honest, I don't get this chapter at all. Well, I understand, but everything was so rushed. Like I didn't get time to absorb the content or sympathise for the MC. I mean, didn't really feel the connection between Summer and Phillip. It was so rushed. I didn't feel like he was at the mine for more than 10 seconds.
On a side note, you should definitely pay attention to the way you structure your sentences. Some wording felt completely out of place in some places and the fact you got all telly there, made things no better.
I definitely think you should read the fist line over again, definitely had some redundancy. Not only in the first line, but throughout the story had redundancy in between.
Either way, I didn't want to be as bold as to suggest any alternative prose, but most definitely this needs some solidity.
Now, I do like the concept.
So, thanks for the good read. Will try to continue reading.
| Bastard From North chapter 15 . 12/22/2014
Subject? So what did they exactly do to him?
This seems really interesting, Phillip hates Magick
but he also keeps ignoring the fact that his sister
I bet it'll be interesting reunion between them :D
Great chapter once again! :)